Articles

Dear Betty,

I am a 21 year old female who has been bleeding a little after sex. I lost my virginity at seventeen ... but it took many tries (my boyfriend had to insert one finger at a time, etc), and I bled after the first time. We stayed together for the next three years and had sex probably upwards of 5 times a week. He was forever telling me that he loved my being "tight" and I never experienced bleeding again. I recently began to date another guy and I have been bleeding about 1/2 the time we have intercourse.

I am on birth control -- so I know it's not related to my period. Sometimes sex hurts (just feels as if he is too big to be in there!), but most of the time I don't even know that I am bleeding until afterwards. My boyfriend is unbelievably nice about it, but I feel awful! My doctor suggested practicing with a dildo so as to stretch myself out a bit. Do you agree? What could this be about?

Thanks, Betty!

E

Dear E,

My first thought was what kind of lubricant are you using? Even though you feel "turned on" and you think you are getting wet, I'd recommend adding additional lubricant. Since you're on the birth control pill and he's not wearing a condom, try my Almond oil with vitamin E in it. Also check out my info under Betty's Barbell and tune into your pelvic floor muscles.

A chronically tense PC muscle might be the culprit and those day when you are more relaxed, you don't bleed. More important than stretching out your vagina would be having orgasms. I get the feeling you are very committed to pleasing your partner and perhaps leaving your own pleasure out of it. While masturbating with a dildo be sure to add clitoral stimulation at the same time. Also you can do this when you are having sex with your partner.

Dr. Betty