Here is my vulva and some simple anatomy for your use and viewing pleasure.
Each vulva is unique and beautiful. View the most common "styles" sketched by Betty and used by Planned Parenthood and educators all over the world.
Most women have asymmetrical labia. Your clitoris is the source of your orgasm.
Your labia are part of your sex organ.
Our inner and outer vulva lips do become engorged with sexual stimulation.
The average woman has dangling inner lips of a darker shade.
Everything you've described sounds pretty average so not to worry.
The lovely petals of your inner lips have nothing to do with getting UTI's.
First off: You must forgive yourself!
The average vulva has dangling inner lips.