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First off… Thank you D&R! A big Thank you to all the bloggers of D&R for helping me become the sexual goddess I “feel” I am today. Me 1st Dammit!

In search on my “lost orgasm”, I stumbled across your website about 3-1/2 years ago and it has changed my life. I am currently 8 months separated from a 16 year marriage, I began to express myself and needs more in the bedroom and he became offended by this, so he constantly
questioned my wants and started with false accusations of infidelity.

So now he’s gone (in-directly thanks again), and I have met my mirror image sexual partner. I am 5 years his elder, and have very limited sexual experience (very vanilla); he however is 30 and has had many sexual partners numbering in the hundreds. I am not worried by this, for I am a first for him in many of our sexual play acts. He can play my body like a violin and I react like the seduced lover I’ve become.

Short version… I can’t say no... to anything, which leads me into our recent play act of vaginal stretching. He has “workin mans” hands, very strong and very wide. He wanted to see if he could fit his hand inside my vagina, and me being on a post orgasm high, agreed. I am not opposed to putting any object into my vagina as long as it’s a pleasurable experience to me, so we proceeded and succeeded! At times it became uncomfortable as he slowly inched forward so he waited for my body to adjust and added more sweet almond oil when needed.

Being another first for both of us to experience together I was very excited and so turned on that I didn’t notice much pain, and after some anal play and multiple orgasms later we showered. Of course it was very evident hours later that he had been there and that’s what I like the most… I want to be reminded of him every time I sit, stand or bend over. Knowing that the slight pain I experience reminds me of him, and me taking on the challenge of being able to take what he can give. I love being a woman!

My question is… this vaginal stretching, is this dangerous? Can it cause me to become too stretched? How often can this be done with causing damage?

Thank you for sharing your knowledge.
L

Dear L,

I always love to hear women's success stories. Glad to be of help here at D&R. As for vaginal fisting, I am not a big fan. It has always seemed excessive to me, especially a man's hand. Two women seem to be less traumatic with their smaller hands. Since I have no experience with "hand balling" I can only say he must have his nails filed down to the skin and be well manicured. Wearing latex gloves would be a good idea if he has any kind of abrasions on his hand.

We know the vagina can stretch to allow a baby to emerge but as a regular sexual activity, I wouldn't do it too often. That's my take; I'm sure there are women who love this and do it frequently. I'm the opposite of you. I like the after feeling of having been fucked but not if there is any serious pain but a little discomfort is OK. I have girlfriends who like to mix a pain with their pleasure.

So to each her own. I'll bet as soon as the novelty wears off you'll be into other aspects of sex that will not cause any after pain unless that's what you desire. Just proceed with caution and continue to enjoy yourself and your new lover.

Dr. Betty