I have a confession – I still sometimes feel like I don’t know what I’m doing when it comes to sex.
“But, but,…you’re a sex coach!”
I know, I know. I am, indeed, a sex coach and educator. The reason I chose this field is because I don’t always feel like I know what I’m doing, so I’ve made it my life’s mission to figure it out.
I’ll let you in on something else – the cards are stacked against any of us ever really feeling that we know enough. Starting from a very young age, those that teach us about sex all seem to have an agenda. Our parents want to protect us from making mistakes that might affect the rest of our lives, and wrongly think the less we know, the less likely we’ll be to explore. That’s what many of our religious leaders tell them. Our school-teachers have to abide by the curriculum provided to them, which is often influenced by the political climate and who happens to be in power. And our lovers – even the good and caring ones – don’t know much more than we do.
We all feel like we should just naturally know how to “do” sex.
I felt this way for a long time, stumbling through my life, sexually active and engaged but not really feeling like I “got it.” I performed at sex, doing my best to fulfill my partners but pushing my own needs to the side. I faked orgasms when I wasn’t sure if I was having one, or not. I didn’t know how to articulate my desires when lovers asked me what I wanted, and when they didn’t ask – I didn’t offer. I thought I was only robbing myself of pleasure, but now I realize I was withholding the joy of my pleasure from my lovers as well.
Two decades ago, I decided to do something about it. There were fits and starts and periods of stasis, but, wow, what a difference it’s made! And, while I still feel like there is more I could know about sex, now there is a whole lot more that I DO know, and want to help you get to knowing more, too.
My name is Jennifer Rahner. I have 25 years of professional experience as a writer and educator, and I’ve spent over 20 years learning everything I can about psychology, gender, sexuality and pleasure.
I formally studied at Saint Joseph’s University, graduating summa cum laude. I’ve studied with leaders in the field of human sexuality, including Betty Dodson, Carlin Ross, Barbara Carrellas, Dr. Juliana Hauser, Reid Mihalko, Cathy from the Intimacy Dojo, and more. I’ve earned certification as a Sexuality Educator from the Sexual Health Alliance (and I work there, too!). And, in every spare moment, I’ve researched on my own, continuing to take classes and reading the latest literature available.
I want to help you be more knowledgeable about your body, your desires, and your orgasm. I want to show you how your sexual story shapes your life, and how understanding that story can help you work through roadblocks to the sex life you want. And I want to help you take charge of how you find and experience pleasure.
Like me, you may still sometimes feel like you don’t know what you’re doing when it comes to sex, and that’s okay. I’ve learned an awful lot over the last twenty years, and I’d love to help you get a little further along in your journey, so those times are the exception and not the rule.
Find out much more about my background, my experience, and how I can help you on my website: jenniferrahner.com.