tension orgasm

i was honest with my boyfriend about only being able to give myself an orgasm. it doesnt bother me that much. sex still feels amazing, but it's really frustrating for him. now he has been trying extra hard lately to find out what i need. the problem is, the way i get myself off has been the same since i was a kid, and is pretty much impossible for another human to do to me. i dont insert anything, in fact i dont even have to take my pants off. i just grind my clit against my hands and squeeze my legs together really tight. i think thats the problem is that i cant contract the muscles down there very well without squeezing my legs closed.

Hi Betty and Carlin!

I'm a 23 year old woman, have been masturbating since childhood & orgasmic since I was 14 or so. I'm gay, mostly. My problem is that I can generally only orgasm as follows: lying on my front, with my legs squeezed together,kind of humping my hand or a vibe. Very occasionally I'll reach orgasm while on my hands & knees, generally while being vaginally fisted, but my legs still have to be together.

My orgasms are not great, feel very tense and forced, not very profound. Often when I'm with a lover I get very frustrated and emotional because I find it so hard to come - I'll be incredibly turned on, but can't hook into the orgasm somehow.