masturbation

ok, so it hasn't exactly been an accident, but i'm 20 years old, and i've never had sex. it isn't for religious reasons, i'm no puritan, and i definitely don't have any (insert period of time or relationship status) rule. i'm actually kind of a hedonist. the truth is i've just never met, or befriended anyone i've wanted to have sex with yet. though i've never "done it", i see it as one of life's pleasures, one that, when the opportunity presents itself i don't want to hesitate to enjoy. here's my issue; since i'm not of the promise ring set, my virginity has never been something that i admit to openly. it's not as though i lie, but most people (some friends included) just assume i'm not because of my age and close relationship with my hitachi magic wand. my first question is; how can i tell my future first notch that i may still have a hymen?

Dear Betty,

I am a male in my mid 40's and currently single. I enjoy masturbating and one day while looking at porn on the internet I saw a advertisment that said "are you Over Masturbating?" My question is there such a thing as "Over Masturbating"? What is the normal frequency for a male my age to masturbate. Currently, I masturbate everyday sometimes multiple times per day. I really enjoy masturbating and find it both relaxing and fun. I would hate to think I am doing harm to myself by "Over Masturbating". Can you help me out?

Dear Betty,

I'm 36 and would really like to sort out my ability to orgasm. I've just come out of an abusive relationship, going through a horrible divorce, my children have been diagnosed with a terrible illness, and it is only me who is supporting them, asked what about 'you' in all of this,.. I'd really like to get some release! And I'd like to get over a lifetime of (maybe) trust issues, but the recent ones especially (once in a lifetiem love turned very scary) and generally heal myself. I need and want to be strong and healed over these years to come and able to reach out to the joys in life, if I am to be able to sail everyone through the years and keep bringing the sunshine in. I'm seeing a sex counsellor, she recommended as powerful vibrator as possible and your name came up but I'm no more the clearer. I'm bi, but have no plan of attempting a relationship for a very long time, but I would like to take this time of privacy to heal myself, but also to enjoy my own pleasures with myself and get to know myself better. Please could you advise.

Hi Betty!

It's so good to be able to discuss this with someone knowledgeable and forthright. I am 55 yrs. old and have been postmenapausal for 6 yrs. My clitoral area is often tender to the touch even though I do use an estrogen cream. This usually happens after enjoying some self pleasure. It is a problem because I want to have sex with my husband and also self pleasure more often but the discomfort is too distracting to achieve orgasm even though the desire is there. I have had the doctor check me for any infection and there is none. Right now I seem to only be able to enjoy sex 1-2 times a week because of this problem.

Dear Linda,

Dear Dr Betty,

I emailed you almost a year ago asking about orgasm and not having feeling when trying to masturbate. I took your advice to heart (or rather, to clitoris), ordered a few different things including the Magic Wand and your Vaginal Barbell. I have to tell you how much you have improved my state of mind and by being able to help to guide me through this discovery process.

Hi Betty,
I'm in deep need of assistance. I used to be able to masturbate, and come to orgasm all the time and every time, when I was a child to mid adolescent age. Unfortunately I had a few experiences of my mom catching me masturbating, and basically condoning it. Then during my high school years I began to masturbate more so than usual to deal with the stress of working on my portfolio.