can large dildoes cause permanenet vaginal stretching?

Sun, 05/01/2011 - 06:36
Submitted by shyandcurious

can using a large thick dildo permanently stretch out my vagina? I currently use a vixen creations silicone one that is about 2 in in diameter or about 6 in around. I did a google search on this & found mixed results & thought maybe I could get an informed reply here, as this is a very informative sex positive site.
I have never had partner sex & do not want to be overly stretched out & not enjoy it as much.

The truth is in the Middle!

Tue, 12/06/2016 - 00:11

Some say no, and some say yes.  I say that "it depends".  I've been into fisting and large insertions for almost 20 years.  I think that using a 6" girth dildo will not make a vagina looser.  If this same woman's absolute max girth is say 8", and she never toys bigger than that, things will always feel the same.  On the other hand, if someone that used to have a max limit of a little less than 8" of girth slowly works their way up to 9" of girth, then 10", then finally up to 11"+, and does this a couple of times a week?  Yes, I think the vagina will then feel looser to the touch when being fingered (if you could compare the before and after, years apart).  It may feel looser to an average size penis as well, but just a lot softer.  Rarely does a vagina get super loose like women fear.  They tend to get more flexible and pliable.
I consider this to be a good thing because I enjoy receiving and giving, when it comes to large dildos.  The change isn't tremendous though.  So, it's more like the vag will feel 20% or one third looser, kinda just softer around the opening.  Then, if the big time stretching is stopped, some of that looseness can go away on its own, but maybe just 10% will be lasting.  It depends.   
In reality, even the couples that post their own porn and vaginal stretching pics are often exaggerating about how loose the woman's vagina has become.  For them, it is dirty talk.  Her vagina hasn't totoally become ruined, even if they use that type of language.  It is mostly just more flexible through frequent stretching.  So, even the women that want to make their vagina looser have a difficult time getting that to actually happen with sex toys alone.  
So, a 6" girth dildo will not make any changes!   That's nothing.  It's only 2" in diameter.  Start using one 3" in diameter, then you may stay looser for a few days. 

No. There are muscles that

Mon, 09/21/2015 - 13:48

No. There are muscles that wrap around your vagina that contract and relax, making it feel 'tighter' or 'looser'. While every person's experience is different, exercising these muscles will allow you greater control over them, so that during sex or masturbation you can 'tighten' or 'loosen' your vagina for your own pleasure.
I started masturbating at a young age and and progressively been using larger toys once I started getting them. While this means I can now take very large toys rather easily, it also means that I've been exercising my kegels VERY intensely, since I squeeze the hell out of all my toys, and have kegel balls that I wear around for fun as well. I've learnt how to control my kegel muscles, so despite my size queen-ness, I can clench my muscles around the penises of the guys I sleep with, and trust me, they can feel the difference, and it makes sex feel good for me too. You can't just leave your vagina relaxed and expect the minimal friction to be pleasurable for you or your partner.

So if keep using the big toys AND do your kegels, PIV (penis-in-vagina) will likely feel good as well, since you'll know how to make it feel good.

No and Yes.

Fri, 04/24/2015 - 15:04

No.  I think you will be fine using something as small as 2 inches in diameter as long as you do kegels regularly.  I used to have a few similar toys that I started using at a farily young age.  It actually gave me more control and I belive made sex more enjoyable when I finally started having it.

Yes, it can.  I stretched my vagina regularly for 7 years.  When I was 19 I stated dating a guy who was obsessed with using toys on me.  Pretty soon he was buying me larger dildos and that is when I learned I really loved getting stretched.   I was pretty much using these thick toys everyday either alone or with my boyfriend.  For a while, I didn't really notice any changes, but then I started to notice my boyfriend did not feel as pleasurable as my thicker toys.  It seemed everytime I would master one size, he would surprise me with a thicker toy.  Over the course of 4 years we progressed to using toys 4 inches thick and two hand fisting.  Over time, I noticed my hole no longer seemed to close and would stay open most of the time.  I also noticed I could take my large toys pretty easy, and I really noticed that I was not enjoying just my boyfiend hardly at all anymore.   Honestly, everything looked and felt much bigger.  My boyfriend would tell me how much he liked my big vagina, and doing these things.  In the back of my mind I knew what I was doing was crazy, but I did it anyway.  I was so stupid.

Then we broke up.  I was devastated.  I was now ashamed of my vagina.  I have been doing kegel exercises, but I never stopped masturbating with the huge toys.  I really need them to get off now.  I did not have sex with another guy for nearly a year.  When I started dating again sex was terrible.   It did nothing for me and I got some surprised looks and more than a few comments.  A few guys have actually told me I am too loose.  It's so depressing and humiliating.  A few guys I have really liked, including one who was pretty large, but the relationships never seem to last long.  They will not come out and admit it, but I know it's because of my vagina.  I've let several of the guys use my huge toys or fist me.  Some were freaked out.  Some really seemed into it, but never seem to stick around. 

I am now 26 depressed and lonely.  I am at the point where I am considering vaginal rejuvenation surgery.  I am scared but don't want to end up alone becuase I was dumb and stretched my vagina. 

Marry me

Sun, 10/29/2017 - 08:57

I like loose pussy, you are not dumb you are rare and beautiful.

Stretched vag is not bad

Wed, 12/07/2016 - 10:29

Do whatever makes you happy. I am hapilly married and my wife has given birth several times so she is pretty loose. Even though she really cannot feel me in her positions that rub her clit are the best for her. What is nice about a loose vag is you can make love for a long time enjoying the connection not just a quick bang. You just have not met the right guy, you are still young . loose vag is the best yes the best in my opinon. For your mans satisfaction of he wants more feeling try raking the inside of a fleshlight and put it in you leave it in there so it gets up to body temp and he can bang away and you will feel the fullness as he expands the sleeve more as he enters. have faith you will find true love.

Some people prefer a Bigger Vagina

Mon, 12/05/2016 - 23:59

We are not the majority, but we do exists.  Some men and a percentage of lesbians find it much more fun when a woman can accomodate large sex toys and receive vaginal fisting.   I'm definitely one of them.  Please, be encouraged.  You could be admired so much at some point for what you consider a fault.

No and Yes

Tue, 08/09/2016 - 06:26

Plese do not worry about your stretched vagina. There are lots and lots of males who love a big vagina. They are much fun and add a new dimension to normal sex or intercourse. I absolutely love them like that and have been very fortunate to enjoy some pretty big ones including my current wife. Our sex life is very diverse and totaly satisfying. I can assure you that if you were able to ask my wife she would tell you the same. We fist a lot and it is one of the most intense and amazing experiences that has not only enhanced our sex life but brought us much closer together. So stop worryig and enjoy it. Just make sure you get the right partner that is also into it.

Being loose

Tue, 08/09/2016 - 04:50

I am so sorry to hear that you are depressed because of your stretched vagina. For your information, it is always possible to have it surgecially tigthened and at one point I did consider having it done but I never did. I am 63 now and I too have a very large and stretched vagina. Likes yours it never closes anymore and gapes most of the time. I married when I was 18 and had my only son at the age of 19. My first husband was 5 years older and the only guy I had slept with so I had no idea about penis sizes but as it turned out he had a very big cock, nearly as thick as coke can. Although I had never been with a man before, i masturbated regularly and often tried to squeeze as many fingers inside me as possible. So when I had my first intercourse with my ex, he explained that it might take a while to get his penis inisde me me and suggested that we used some lubrication but to his surpirse he was able to get his penis inside me without too much trouble. I experienced my first real penetrative orgasm and had many after that. I had an easy birth too. After a few pushes my son's head started to appear and the whole birth took only 30 minutes. I never torn my vagina and needed no stitches afterwards. Our sex life remained good and I never gave it any further thought. Unfortunately it did not work out between us and after 3 years we separated. I had several boyfriends but none of them did much for me sexually until I met hubby no2. His cock had a decent lenght but no girth. His cock was certainly the thinnest I have ever had but that did not matter to me because I really loved him. He was kind and considerate and was very good with my son too, who also seemed to love him. He was also a very good lover but I had not been able to achieve an orgasm from just his cock which did not go unnoticed to him. One day when we were having sex he said that he had bought me a present but I was not allowed to see it so he blindfloded me. I was very excited and had no idea what was coming. Next thing I could feel this lovely soft thing slipping in between my legs and before I could say something it started to vibrate. We had lots of fun with it and I had many fabulous orgasms from it too. A few months later we were having sex in a doggy position and I was rubbing the vibrator over my clit but had the incredible urge to push it inside me next to his cock. I moved it into position and gently pushed it inside me next to his cock. The feeling was incredible and we both had the most amazing orgasm together. Afterwards we talked about it and like your guy, hubby told me that he loved to see me taking larger objects inside my vagina. I told him that I would be happy with that and for every birthday I was giving a bigger dildo. After a while I started to notice that my vagina was gettng looser and I could not realy feel his cock anymore but that did not matter as we used other things like fingers or a vibrator together with his cock. After a few years we got into fisting and by the time we split he was able to put his cock and hand at the same time inside my vagina. After we split I me several guys who were disgusted with the size of my vagina. A couple of them were unable to maintain an erection whilst inside me. I contemplated having it stitched up until I heard about a website that catered for some unusual tastes. I decided to join it and was overwhelmed by the responses from guys into large pussies and fisting. After getting to know a few a bit better I did meet several of them. The sex was great with all of them. So much better than regular intercourse and I had lovely comments about the size of my vagina and how great it looked. I am still with one the guys today and we have now progressed to double fisting and are loving it. I am proud of my large vagina and certainly not embarrassed about it, actually the opposite. I hope that my experience may help you feeling different about yourself and let me assure you that there a lots and lots of guys out there who would love you even more when they find out. Just be confident about it and make sure that the guy(s) you want to go to bed with know about it beforehand because that makes all the difference. Good luck and be happy.

Ever hear of the Law of Attraction?

Sat, 06/11/2016 - 14:34

I hope you're not still struggling with this, but just in case you are, I wanted to help out! Your attitude is creating these problems for you! Change your attitude toward your body! Love it, including your vagina. Use affirmations to help you change your thinking towards it. Your body is just atoms vibrating at a frequency we perceive as "matter", and your thoughts are vibrations too. If you change your thoughts you can change your life, including your body, in any way you wish! Try saying, "I love my body! My vagina is just the right size for me. People love my body and my vagina." Trust me, it will work if you allow it to! ❤️


Mon, 06/06/2016 - 12:45

I am sorry you are sad but I would love a woman with a loose pussy like yours.

Stretching in a woman is really hot!

Thu, 09/24/2015 - 16:54

As a man, my thoughts on what attracts me to vaginas is two-fold. 1. How much it can stretch, and 2. How strong the muscles are. I think ability and contrast is fundamentally the most attractive atributes in a partner- either in sex or in their character. It drives my partner wild by gently (slowly) but intensely stretching her out with my hands penis or toy. It makes her have intense orgasms, but it surely should be done with vaginal muscle strength training. Try the jade goddess tradition, it's a great book and works to strengthen your undercarriage. You might need to get a bigger egg or kegel fitness tool, but stick to it and you'll have amazing contrast between squeezing and stretching. I think your well used vagina is super hot, just take care of it with a few squeezes and you'll have the confidence you had at first. It's hard work, and takes focus like being in the gym- stay determined and you will find yourself exactly how you want to be. You've got prowess that not a lot of ladies can master or even undertake, so congrats! Besides, childbirth will be much easier and you can avoid vaginal or perenium tears. You can find the man who is really into you. Good luck, sexy!

there are guys who would love you as you are

Mon, 09/14/2015 - 17:54

I second what the previous poster said. There are a lot of guys with a fetish for what you're describing. I include myself in that group, and have spent countless hours doing "research" (heh heh) on the idea of oversized toys, fisting, making a vagina permanantly loose, and so on. It seems to me like this particular kink is WAY more common to guys than women, and that you would find it to be a "seller's market" full of highly interested guys, if you were to tap into the kink community. 

I hope you can take this to heart and not feel bad about yourself, and instead find a guy who will share your sexual interests. 

Poor you

Tue, 06/02/2015 - 13:32

Now you're getting a taste of the male perspective, and the unending assault on our self-esteem. You've got problems that no dildo can cure, seek help from a licensed psychologist/therapist.

There are guys (like me) who would love to date you.

Mon, 05/04/2015 - 17:12

Seriously join and check out the groups.  There is one for very large toys.  Fisting etc.  If its something you love you don't have to give it up.  feel free to message me there my name is Grydian on the site.

yah, im sure that'll fix the problem

Sun, 06/12/2016 - 21:54

take her to the point of no return.. fetlife is a place full of stable individuals /s
fetish guys like you that try to convert people really frustrate me. especially the cucks


Sun, 08/07/2016 - 07:04

Letting someone know that there is a community of people who have similar sexual interests isn't trying to "convert" anyone, it's just letting someone know that a certain website exists and that it could be possibly positive. There's nothing bad about big toy, fisting, or stretching fetishes and there's no reason not to mention that not everyone has vanilla sexual tastes.

I Don't Believe It's Permanent But....

Sun, 03/08/2015 - 01:48

I'm in exactly the same position as you, except the dildo I used was only about 4 inches around. I had to stop using it because it did stretch me out to the point whre I noticed a significaant difference in  tightness even after a full day of not touching it. It's been almost a week now, and my vagina has definitely been stretched out by about a half an inch...I was so shocked! I don't believe it's permanent, but I'll probably start doing Kegels soon, and I will not be touching the toy again until I can get back to my original size.

dr. betty's barbell..

tif999's picture
Sun, 11/13/2011 - 09:31

i, too, love using large, dildos to masturbate and i've also had a few partners who were very well endowed- and NO my pussy isn't permantly stretched out from either. your PC muscle (if its well-excercised) should have no problem tightening you back up when you're done masturbating. and if you are still really concerned that your getting 'loose', i would suggest getting a hold of betty's barbell- it is PERFECT for getting the most out of your kegels and the weight can really help strengthen your PC. 
remember your pussy needs excercise just like any other muscle in your body. happy squeezing! 


Wed, 05/25/2011 - 12:34
WildOrchid (not verified)

Vagina is kept tight by muscles. It gets loose if they are not exercised or if they were damaged - which may happen during childbirth. Normal use of the dildo could not do such things. When I say normal I mean consensual, without pain caused by too much force. But than again, there would have to be a lot of force and a lot of pain before irreversible damage could occur. Woman who masturbates with a dildo, especially if she uses PC muscle squeezes to make if feel even better will have better muscle control. Therefore her pussy would feel tighter when deliberately clenched.

That natural and pleasurable for both tightness is sometimes confused with tightness caused by muscles clenching from stress or fear of pain. That involuntary (and unpleasant for the woman) clenching is what sometimes causes tightness during first encounters after a long break (that's where no dick=tight pussy myth comes from). When woman's body is used to penetration and has fresh memories of it being pleasurable it won't apply defense mechanisms like clenching. In stead you can decide when to clench and release.

That said, if your preferred dick size is large (and it looks like it from the toys you like), using large dildos won't make you like the average or small dicks ;) . Your pussy likes what it likes. Same as me using my large glass dildo won't make me carve that kind of penetration every time - my preferred size is average-small.


Mon, 06/23/2014 - 22:34

My beautiful wife is a size queen. She has for the last 15+ years been using dildos almost on a daily basis. She will masturbate with a dildo during the day on her own and almost always prior or after we make love. It is accurate to say that she masturbates a minimum of once a day with a large toy.

She has gradually over the years increased the size of dildo she uses. Her daily toy now has an advertised width of 3.25 inches which is quite significant.

While my wonderful wife is likely an exception because she has a very strong personal preference towards larger toys and has been constantly pushing her boundaries for years. The effects from her masturbation are undeniable and obvious both visually and to the touch. I suspect that infrequent use of a large sex toy, maybe once or twice a week would have no effect, but constant use of very large toys does have an effect over time.

Passive agressiveness?

Tue, 06/02/2015 - 13:43

I have a feeling your usage of "beautiful" and "wonderful" is intended to be sarcastic. Go find someone who's satisfied with you. Your wife is selfish, plain and simple. She doesn't give a fuck about you, and your feelings, or sexual desires, whereas you've stood by her whilst she augered out a rental property in her cunt. 10.2 inches in Circumference? wow. That's MORE than double the somewhat-above average males Circumference. The average newborn has a head Circumference  of 13in in comparison. Go find true happiness.


Sun, 08/07/2016 - 07:10

There was no reason to assume passive aggresiveness and also, this is a disgusting and hateful comment. Someone choosing to use big toys doesn't cheat their partner out of anything, and that's not the point anyway. If someone wants to use big toys, even if they're not as "tight", that is their choice. No one is under any obligation to make their body an object of pleasure for someone else.

My wife is similar.

Tue, 04/21/2015 - 12:04

Her toys have gradually become bigger and so has her pussy and the change has been significant.    Where two fingers were once a tight fit, now they have room to spare.   Lots of room.

The interesting thing about it though is that she now has powerful orgasms from penetration alone. albeit big penetrations.    That was something that never happened in the past.

Same here.

Wed, 10/07/2015 - 14:16

Even after two kids there was very little difference in tightness with my wife.  To spice things up we got her a big dildo about 5 years ago.  The toys have gradually gotten bigger, with her biggest now over 3 inches wide.  Her first "big" dildo is now small by comparison.  Two fingers used to feel tight, now it is four, and I can fit my whole hand in.  Same thing with the orgasms.  She never got off on penetration alone before, now she does.    

Not Necessarily ...

Tue, 09/09/2014 - 23:37

No disrespect to your wife, but what you have observed over the "years" and the effect that you've "Observed ovver time" may just be the normal "looseness" that happens to all of us as we age.  Our muscles don't hold up the way they use to when we were younger and our skin stretches as we got older as well.
I find it hard to say that conclusively "large toys do have an effect over time"  unless your wife started in her 20's and after say, 10 years  you are seeing this evidence.
Just my 2 cents.

My ex was in her early 20's

Thu, 03/26/2015 - 22:44

My ex was in her early 20's when she started using large dildos. She used it twice a day on average. Over time (I'm talking about 2 years) her dildos got larger and larger, and yes there was a noticeable change in both appearance and tightness over her vagina. So frequent use can and most likely will stretch your vagina out. now on the other hand, my wife has a couple pretty large toys (not nearly as large as my ex's though) and she occasionally uses it, usually once to twice a week and she is still very tight, one of the tighter women I have been with