Recent comments

  • You're an Inspiration to Me as a Young Woman, a Sexual Being, & One Day a Mother   1 day 21 hours ago

    My three visits and frequent correspondence with Betty have spawned many profound
    changes in my thinking, writing, and behavior. Over the course of our
    friendship, Betty has been my Sensei, advocate, and adversary. Formal education
    had taken me far to become a competent researcher, writer, and communicator;
    however, through Betty’s midwifery, I was reborn with a new gnosis, desirous to
    share my personal experiences and create a new virtual and personal identity
    for me.

    Betty, you extract great power and wisdom from distilling  and synthesizing dualities...your soul has blessed you with an immortal aesthetic in body, word, and deed that has shifted the world axis to point to orgasmic entitlement, erotic fulfillment of the senses, and to cast off the vitriolic sludge of dogma and ignorance that pervades our society.

    You impregnated me with a vision for self-realization inspired with the force of a tsunami boldly razing old paradigms and whose churning waters mold new landscapes in my psyche. For this I am forever grateful to you, and to God for having placed such a beautiful human being on this planet.

    Betty, yes, this is so exciting...in fact, since meeting you and beginning our wonderful correspondence, I've tapped into other raisons d'etre: that of the writer in first person, the emergent blogger, the seeker of a cyber identity, the co-masturbator, the communicant cock.

    You, by being openly you, eloquently you, sexually you, happily you, honestly you, empower us to be ourselves. The Bodysex Workshop Carlin and you offer is the most powerful manifestation of aesthetic, empathetic sexuality I have ever witnessed. You both tirelessly advocate for sexuality as a path open to all for discovering our aesthetic, our erotic selves, and ultimately our humanity.

     

    Dick and clit, variations on a theme,

    Big brother and excitable sister,

    Charged lightning rods of sexual energy, conductors of erotic symphonies-

    Can they communicate?

    In front of the hearth of masturbatory fires they sing the ineffable lyrics of our creation,

    Harmonizing across multiple octaves,

    Creating orgasmic crescendos.

    Yes, we affirm each other.

    Yes, we affirm each other.

    “Let the sex energy sing
    out!”(Betty) 

     

     

  • Can a Woman Have Too Many Orgasms?   2 days 2 hours ago

    I'm 53 and she is 55. I'm 6'1 250 and she is 5' and 120. she warned me that she was multiorgasmic. She was not kidding! She does not care for oral but loves manual stimulation. She has an enlarged G spot that can really drive her crazy. Her orgasms come one st a time and then are non stop. We have made love for as long as 10 hours and I could not count her orgasms. While in orgasm she becomes very ridgid, she screams (but buries her face in the mattress or grabs the sheets and stuffs her face in them) and always begs for me to pound her even harder! Most times if I have my fingers busy on her G spot and she comes the vaginal contractions are so strong I cannot remove my fingers! OH, and she comes just from penetration too. She has a series of enlarged nerve ending in the vaginal entrance that contribute to this. So with the enlarged G spot and those wonderful nerve ending she is in bliss when we are lucky enough to get together. Our lovemaking session run from 2 hours to the afformentioned 10 hours. I taught her some positions she had never tried and am the first (her pelvis has a strange tilt that makes on the bed doggie a no go for her, I stand next to the bed) to successfully penetrate her doggie style (her favorite now). I love this little woman and her many orgasms!

  • Is It Too Late to Change My Masturbation Technique?   2 days 5 hours ago

    It is a journey.
    I was you 4 years ago. At 34 I finally experienced an orgasm with a vibrator, I could never orgasm another way other than humping something. That doesn’t allow for good partner sex.
    I discovered Dodson at 34 and started using her suggestions.
    After some attempts using a vibrator and some porn I orgasmed. I was so giddy. I continued on my own moving to a bullet to start off with and finishing with the magic wand. The first time I came with the wand I squirted.
    My next hurdle was to begin masturbating with my boyfriend no sex, I was learning to not be ashamed of my body. It worked all along I just didn’t know it or listen to my body’s pleasure signals. I was so happy after I came in front of him and then I began to cry because of all the shame I have felt my whole life lifted and I wondered why I let the past hold me captive for so long.
    A year later I orgasmed using just my hand. It takes a little more longer to do it that way so I stick to my wand.
    About 6 months later I was able to orgasm during sex, he was laying on his side and I was on my back with my legs over his hips as he pumped I had room to use my wand. Amazing!
    He usually comes before me though he tries not to, but if he does he uses a glass dildo that has bumps on it while I use my vibrator and he uses his tongue on my right nipple. Talk about orgasms and multiple ones that leave me shaking!
    I was with my boyfriend for 3 years before I could orgasm with him. I never had orgasmed with any of my partners, and he was a dickhead too. So it had nothing to do with him really, it was me learning my body, feeling comfortable with myself and letting shame go.
    He changed and now he’s my husband

    So it’s a process and 4.5 years later I finally have the sex life i always wanted.
    My favorite vibrator to start off with or use when I’m alone is the “satisfier”, the dildo reaches a spot inside that gives the mind blowing orgasm while using the wand.
    I get my toys from lovehoney.com because they have a full return policy if you don’t like the product. I don’t know any other company that does that. When you are first learning what you like and don’t like you don’t want to end up spending money on something that sits in a drawer.
    It’s a journey and it takes time. So learn you and then involve your partner.
    Best wishes!

  • During Her Orgasm I Experience Something Like an Electric Shock   2 days 23 hours ago

    My partner and I are experiencing the same electrical energy during sex. I've never experienced this with anyone else and H's observation that it's happening as he and his wife are getting older is interesting to me. Personally, I might also put it down to my change to a fruitarian diet which is high in biophotons and electrical energy. He gets the shocks on the ridge of his head as I orgasm, while I can also feel his surges of near ejactulation as electrical. I've not been able to find any other information on the subject yet, so any insight is useful.

  • Dear Catcallers   5 days 1 hour ago

    Pretty interesting post and interesting Noa's idea. In general, I am a supporter of the idea that a woman should be gentle and compassionate, but modern society requires too much from women, so it's no surprise that they are getting stronger and more aggressive. You gave me a rather interesting topic to write my essay about.

  • How Can I Increase the Size of My Clitoris?   5 days 5 hours ago

    I'm 31 and have such a small clit. I recently got a vertical hood piercing and had to settle for a horizontal one bc I don't have enough hood. I had the vertical piercing for a month but my body pushed it to the edge. I fell in love with the feeling of the piercing on my clit. I'm not happy with the horizontal piercing bc it's basically just an annoying decoration. I saw the answer above, about the clit pump and was wondering, does this also grow the hood with it? I wouldn't mind a bigger clit in the process bc orgasms are a struggle for me.

  • Women Love Men Orgasming Inside Them   5 days 11 hours ago

    I know this is an old post, but I was just browsing the entries here, and came upon this one.

    There's nothing like feeling a man come inside you, especially if you've had a good session and he's given you lots of pleasure. I love how they get so focused in those last few moments, and it feels so huge and hot. They fill my entire world. Even if they aren't particularly grabby, they tend to suddenly be grabby and it's weirdly nice. It's like something in my body takes over completely, and I can feel myself urging him on into it. No matter how many orgasms I've had, it'll usually draw another from me when he's there, and then that winding down afterwards is good. I've heard it described as feeling empty by guys just post orgasm, for a woman on the receiving end it's the exact opposite. Ever so satisfying, and if it's a committed relationship, even better while I can feel all that lovely wet inside me as he softens. I just want to hold him in my arms. If I wasn't already wrapped around him, I definitely am then... :)

    So, long story short, in kind of answer to men who think their pleasure isn't important. All pleasure is important. I'm aware I don't speak for all women, but if I'm having sex with you, and I've had a good time, I want you to come. And I want you to let me make you do it, inside me. Isn't that one of the most wonderful things about sex? That our pleasures are taken together? That we enjoy the same things from our uniquely differing perspectives?

  • Is My Penis Too Small?   5 days 14 hours ago

    Im a small guy of 4.5 inches. Saying your penis is small is objectively correct. Calling it too small is a judgement that any woman is entitled to make re her personal preference. Most are unlikely to be so direct and undiplomatic.
    Being too small for her doesn't reflect on you in any way. Nor does it question you masculinity.
    I have to take care during penetrative sex to find a surface to stimulate. Just pounding straight in and out, barely touching her is unsatisfying for women in my experience, although doggy style is nice and tight.
    I have discussed size with a couple of my partners in the past. both agreed that sex is different with a larger penis(than mine!). One of them (My current love) told me that she has had a good stretching, and she enjoyed it, but that she wasn't that bothered by my small size. As she said I'm lucky she has good muscle tone.
    So yes you may be too small for some, others will see you as more than a penis, and some will be completely not concerned by your size at all.
    Don't get fixated by size, make the best of what you have, and enjoy life. Your attidude and confidence re your sexual encounters will have more bearing on the outcome than the size of your equipment, most of the time.

  • If I Met Him in a Fetish Club, Does He Have a STD?   6 days 14 hours ago

    It is no more and no less dangerous than sex with anyone else. Both guys present a risk. Your friend most certainly was unreasonably stigmatising a community but perhaps worse was being incredibly naive.

    People have sex with all sorts of people. They don't stay within a box marked "fetish" or "straight" or "other" and neither do STDs. One of the largest increases in STDs in the UK has been amongst pensioners, straight, white, middle class pensioners!

    Not even granny is safe and never has been.

    So all sex, like life, comes with a risk and part of being grown-up means recognising that risk, taking care and getting tested and treated if necessary.

  • Lady Madonna   6 days 15 hours ago

    & Feminist Indignation, it's wonderful to hear your voice, to enjoy your wonderful energy and positive attitude.

    The connections we make with people in life, define us as people, whether that's families born or made, or friends along the journey. 

  • My Girlfriend's Vagina is Too Big For My Penis   1 week 15 hours ago

        You will only need to concern yourself with size if..."YOU" are concerned with your size. Quality sex is about the mental connection first. If you establish a comfortable stare of mind with each other, then foreplay, which by the way starts long before you get in to the bedroom. Then you sexual encounter will not be dependent on size. Because your focus is on each orher, Not penis/vagina suze.

  • If I Met Him in a Fetish Club, Does He Have a STD?   1 week 1 day ago

     I don't agree with this advice, at all.  First, there is no research to suggest that having a lot of sex, with casual partners, is more safe than any sex with any partner.   And more importantly, I think, focusing on self pleasure as the most important determinant of all decisions, is frightening.  We are all connected and we are all human.  Respect for self and for others is the cornerstone of civilization -- which is already well under attack in the worl today.  
    Advising this young woman to simply do what she pleases with no regard for anyone else, is simply bad advice.
    and yes, you could get an STD if you have a cut in your mouth.

  • Beyond Serial Monogamy   1 week 3 days ago

    Your story is so interesting.  I was in an open marriage for seventeen years and had a great variety of relationships.  With some men, I was orgasmic but not all.  I got involved with one man for eight years, he became good friends with my husband.  They even got together and bought me my birthday present one year.  It was a great time.
    I realized that an open relationship takes a lot of honesty and trust.  It worked well for seventeen years until my husband had an affair with a woman who wanted to steal him from me.  She promised him that she would never have an affair and would give him a child, which I couldn't.
    We divorced, they had a daughter and she had an affair.  They were divorced and we got back together, but he wanted a monogamous relationship, which was fine with me.  I was depressed and the antidepressants killed my libido. So I agreed.  It's been another seventeen years and we are really happy. 
    I really hope you write your autobiography; it would be fascinating.  I really hope you do.  I've been following you since the 70's and you have always been fascinating.  Best of luck with the rest of your life, wishing you health, happiness and wealth. 

  • Loving My Wet Pussy   1 week 3 days ago

    Both your story and the pictures that illustrate that story are thoroughly lovely, adorable even. I have felt a similar arousal at having my male genitals photographed, and part of it is being captured and my relinquishing of control.

  • Planned Parenthood is NOT Selling Baby Parts   1 week 4 days ago
  • Lady Madonna   1 week 4 days ago

    Thank you North London, I’ve been missing your and Lizzie
    Smith’s stark commentary!

    What a beautiful photograph of connection, the hardships of parenting conveyed therein and in Carlin’s hard felt experiences of parenthood. By stereotype half the family is missing and by some cultural manifestation that’s OK. For sure a newborn knows the voice of the father just as the mother’s or the bark of the family dog. Just as the flooded nature of parental multi tasking does not rest solely with the female nor does clear headedness reside with the similarly flummoxed
    male.

    Understanding the neurobiology of what bonds us hopefully at long last might be becoming more important than learning ideology. John Bowlby a rather austere British aristocrat raised by a nanny stumbled on what was to become attachment theory when study children separated during the blitz from their families. Read mothers as fathers we deployed, killed or stereotypically austere. Despite the fact men’s rights groups attack Bowlby’s work as sexist; ironically he is the father of the importance of fathers in children’s lives. His research is why parents are now allowed to see their hospitalized children.

    It is learning from family, mothers, fathers, dogs, siblings, grand fathers, grand mothers, and neighbors that attachment is safe that babies’ brains develop into adults more likely to be compassionate and responsible members of community.

    We owe so much to those who can model safety in connection, care and compassion to allow our brains to grow so that we can pass that love on to the next generation. Note: the absence of social rank or gender from that statement.

    Hallelujah Hallelujah, Hallelujah.

  • Finally a Documentary on Penis Size   1 week 4 days ago

    You offer a valuable observation. When it comes to fantasy, it is true. Not all women's fantasies explicitly include anything to do with penis size, but when they do, the idealized penis on her idealized lover is described as being large. Nancy Friday wrote a couple of groundbreaking books in the late 1960s and early 1970s regarding women's sexual fantasies, which she collected and compiled with her own commentary. She doesn't make the point, but it was clear to me from reading her books that whenever a woman mentioned penis size as part of her primary sexual fantasy it was significantly longer or thicker, or both, than average.

    Well, one woman in "Forbidden Flowers," the second and more explicit of the two books, mentioned that her husband had a small penis and was sexually neglectful of her, but her fantasy involved humiliating him with a harem of better-endowed men showing him how they please her. She didn't leave it there, because the humilation would be the end point for men more than for women. The purpose of the humiliaiton in her fantasy was to encourage him to make a greater effort to please her with the physical attributes he has. The others who mentioned penis size all had a clear preference for large ones.

    Granted, there's a silent majority for whom something average size or slightly small is fully acceptable as part of the overall man. A large belly isn't ideal, but overweight men manage to marry. SImilarly, men with small penises manage to partner-up and marry, but at some point it's a real issue.

    There are plenty of man- or woman-on-the-street interviews asking "does size matter?" of passers by. Typically, about half of women say it doesn't matter but what he does with it does. However, only one such video I've seen asked the obvious follow-up question of women who said "size doesn't matter." The follow-up question is: "So, if size doesn't matter, then two inches would be enough?" Then, virtually all qualified their original answers to say "no", or "now, I don't know."

    This isn't entirely theoretical or speculative on my part. I have the life experience of a middle-aged man, married twice, who navigated social situations, dating, and sexual relationships endowed with an erect penis under two inches in length. It's been interesting, and mostly enjoyable.

  • Finally a Documentary on Penis Size   1 week 4 days ago

    You offer a valuable observation. When it comes to fantasy, it is true. Not all women's fantasies explicitly include anything to do with penis size, but when they do, the idealized penis on her idealized lover is described as being large. Nancy Friday wrote a couple of groundbreaking books in the late 1960s and early 1970s regarding women's sexual fantasies, which she collected and compiled with her own commentary. She doesn't make the point, but it was clear to me from reading her books that whenever a woman mentioned penis size as part of her primary sexual fantasy it was significantly longer or thicker, or both, than average.

    Well, one woman in "Forbidden Flowers," the second and more explicit of the two books, mentioned that her husband had a small penis and was sexually neglectful of her, but her fantasy involved humiliating him with a harem of better-endowed men showing him how they please her. She didn't leave it there, because the humilation would be the end point for men more than for women. The purpose of the humiliaiton in her fantasy was to encourage him to make a greater effort to please her with the physical attributes he has. The others who mentioned penis size all had a clear preference for large ones.

    Granted, there's a silent majority for whom something average size or slightly small is fully acceptable as part of the overall man. A large belly isn't ideal, but overweight men manage to marry. SImilarly, men with small penises manage to partner-up and marry, but at some point it's a real issue.

    There are plenty of man- or woman-on-the-street interviews asking "does size matter?" of passers by. Typically, about half of women say it doesn't matter but what he does with it does. However, only one such video I've seen asked the obvious follow-up question of women who said "size doesn't matter." The follow-up question is: "So, if size doesn't matter, then two inches would be enough?" Then, virtually all qualified their original answers to say "no", or "now, I don't know."

    This isn't entirely theoretical or speculative on my part. I have the life experience of a middle-aged man, married twice, who navigated social situations, dating, and sexual relationships endowed with an erect penis under three inches in length. It's been interesting, and mostly enjoyable.

  • Lady Madonna   1 week 6 days ago

    & as well as a scarcity of strong images of motherhood, we see fathers airbrushed out of images of the parent-child relationship entirely, as if irrelevant past conception.
    No one died and thought they should spend more time at the office: the relationships we build and maintain are one of the most import parts of our lives, yet women are denied strength and men denied even a prescence in images of one of the key relationships we have. 

    Isn't that more than a little odd?

  • Men Wearing Their Girlfriend's Clothes   2 weeks 5 hours ago

    Yes it might seem strange to most, but it's not about other men or being gay at all!! I love women , it's the textures and comfort!

  • If I Met Him in a Fetish Club, Does He Have a STD?   2 weeks 1 day ago

    I second what Betty says. Kinksters (like me) get tested often and understand disclosure as part of Risk Aware Consensual Kink. 

    Not everyone you meet at a club will feel the same way, but know that you have the right to ask and to walk away if someone doesn't negotiate in good conscience. 

    Kinky or vanilla, there are people who are responsible with their sexual health and the health of any partner they may have. 

  • If I Met Him in a Fetish Club, Does He Have a STD?   2 weeks 1 day ago

    S,
    I think it is brave of you and good that you are permitting yourself to explore and reach out on behalf of your sexual pleasure and needs.  You definely do need to take care but such clubs can be a great way to openly and honestly meet others who match you, share your own particular sexual desires and practices. 
    In fact, I met my own husband at such a club, Masturbation Mixer. No touching allowed and no obligations, just naked masturbation, wine, music and talk. Was a safe and open and honest atmosphere. We both share intense masturbatory needs along with similar interests and so we connected. We both love and support each other and masturbate often.  That's so important these days.
    Martha

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