Recent comments

  • Loving This Picture of Vicky Balch   17 hours 12 min ago

    Beautiful

  • Thinking of Labiaplasty for My Large Dark Labia   17 hours 14 min ago

    Most sexually aware and sophisticated men would love a big mouthful of beautiful labia!

  • you decide.... circumcised or uncircumcised?   22 hours 23 min ago

    Hi
    I was circumcised as an adult so know the before and after. I couldn't imagine why any adult male would choose circumcision. However, I discovered that many actually choose to be circumcised. What shocked me to the core was that it appeared be mainly driven by women! Couldn't believe it...
    The reasons appeared to be three-fold.
    1. Cleanliness and appearance with foreskin
    2. Appearance of the circumcised penis
    3. How do I put this? A number of women seemed happy that the circumcision effectively reduced the penis to a human dildo. The actual removal of ALL of the sensitive bits (for examply, the frenulum, my best friend) was the whole point!. The importance of THAT, it would appear, was to actively decrease the pleasure felt, in order for the guy to last longer.
    Check for yourself. Look for "circumcision" and "tumblr". 
    Mind boggling, at least to me
    Interested to see any feedback

  • At the Age of 87 I'm Still Having Orgasms   1 day 7 hours ago

    dear dr. dodson

    reading your articles i could experience orgasm by stimulating my own clitoris ,i am 55 and never experienced orgasm with my spouse , he comes in 3 minutes ,and doesn't use much foreplay , or oral sex. so i don't have much time to masturbate during partner sex . and i begin to masturbate or use massagor after he fells asleep . he says i am cold and many women come in only 3 minutes so for many years i felt i was sick and didn't ask for sex much .  on the other hand i have had contraceptive pills for many years. i have 3 girls and these days i feel i want more sex although i don't orgasm with him . unfortunately i can not find a dildo in my country iran .  it is not legal but i use massagor on my clit and i come in 3 minutes by clit not vaginally . could you please advise what more i can do. i have started kegel excercises as well. 

  • The Absence of Pleasure Leads to Systemic Violence   1 day 17 hours ago

    I'm heartbroken to hear this Carlin. You and Betty were instrumental in setting me on a path to being content and confident with my sexuality in my late 40s for the first time in my life. Having a lifetime of self-judgement and judgement of others lifted from me has meant the world to me. I hope you're not forced to step away by the current horrible climate. All the very best from me.

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  • Natural Cycles is a Birth Control App as Effective as the Pill   2 days 3 hours ago

    There are plenty of apps that help you monitor your fertility and ask you to enter your temperature each morning. The difference? Those can be downloaded for free or $3.99 max and Natural Cycles costs $80/year. What's with the annual service fee? The app runs on algorithms, just like any normal calendar or FAM app. I suspect they set the price point to what women pay for birth control.
    [= 12.8px]I'm glad it's making news so that women can become more in tune with their bodies and enjoy a hormone-free, side effect-free option, but the subscription payment structure is such a turn-off.[/]

  • I'm Wet, Trembling & Breathing Hard But No Orgasm?   2 days 3 hours ago

    So this is very embarrassing but I'd really love to get options, suggestions, help. I am 20 and I experience what I think was a orgasm almost two or three years ago which was just I got really wet I don't really know how it felt but I just can't now and I hate it I want to so bad I don't really masterbait a lot never really I'm just not horny until I'm with my significant and it's not like he doesn't pleasure me or do what ever I want because he does and it's not like his cocks to small I get really wet everytime and enjoy it and I actually try to organism I really don't understand what I'm doing wrong. I'll occasionally try and watch porn and try to find my self and I'll et wet and then just stop and I'll get alittle wet and when I do I just stop I'll lose any interest in it I don't know what im doing wrong it actually pissed me off. I've read a couple articles briefly like maybe it's because I'm so tiny down there like my clit and and vagina is so tight even if we just had sex like ten minutes later if we go again it's still really tight I'm not sure but if anyone has any advice itd be highly appreciated

  • When I Orgasm, I Poop A Little!   2 days 13 hours ago

    Phew I am so happy to read these other posts on this subject
    To the degree I am going to talk to my new male friend about this because I have been so embarrassed it's stopped an orgasm
    Never happened before

  • Need Help Explaining to BF How to Touch My Clitoris?   2 days 14 hours ago

    I know it can be tricky to tell menn what to do (they are kinda thick in theirs skull sometime there). But maybe just tell him openly if he can stimuly longer on your clit, and that it would make you very happy if he did.
    If not that working, bring a vibrator and do it yourself. Guys don't always know that much about how to do these things, even the ones who have had sex for decades even. So either a person have to teach or take matters into own hands.

  • When I Orgasm, I Poop A Little!   2 days 21 hours ago

    When my wife orgasms she would bear down, I guess it intensifies her feeling. I also notice when she orgasms during oral sex her anus pulses pretty intensely. As time went on, I found I could make her orgasms more intense when I pressed my thumb on her anus or inserted a finger in her butt during oral sex. This would make her bear down more and sometimes she would fart or start to pass a little poop(turtle head)! I know it really embarrassed her, but I could tell how this ass play was so arousing for her. One time while we were having sex, I had my finger in her vagina and I could feel through her vagina she had a big, hard turd in her rectum. I started pushing down on her back wall of her vagina. This slowly started pushing the poop out of her ass. When an inch or two passed out of her butt, she exploded in orgasm. All the while I used my thumb to resist her from passing all the poop. Afterwards she pooped. I told her if she likes that feeling of pooping during orgasm, it's okay. We just keep some towels in a dresser by the bed and lay them under her hips during sex. She is more comfortable now with her funny orgasms. She likes it so much and that I'm so understanding that she holds it in all day until we have sex. What we do know is have inter course and she's learned to control her bowels to poop just as her orgasm is starting.

  • Need Help Explaining to BF How to Touch My Clitoris?   3 days 3 hours ago
    ?

    She's asking how to communicate how she likes her clit touched, and your advice is essentially, don't even bother; just take charge of it yourself? That doesn't seem very helpful. 

  • The Absence of Pleasure Leads to Systemic Violence   3 days 14 hours ago

    Dearest Carlin
    I do not often comment... but i really want to tell you how sorry I am that you have to go through this. I hope you can teach the people from ASC some valuable lessons about a healthy development of sexuality. The states are really crazy with their fear of sex. I am from Switzerland and while not everything is rosy here, we defenetily are more relaxed about sex, nakedness and parenting.
    I really like to thank you for your amazing work togehter with Betty, which is still transforming my life and the life of my friends.
    Trough this site I get the feeling of knowing you, and I look at you as a very strong worrier women. Therfore I know you have the strenght and will power to protect your family!

    Lots of love and support from Switzerland!
    Karine

  • I Got in My Bathtub & Turned the Facet on Full Blast, Slipped My Clit Under the Stream & Waited   5 days 13 hours ago

    Anon,
    If you send your post directly to Betty Dodson (just cut and paste) into the Ask Dr Betty section, I'm sure she'd respond.

    Your partner might find it useful to try using a (waterproof) vibrator in the bath tub rather than the flow of water. Once she can orgasm with her vibrator lying in the water, she could try practicing with the vibrator lying all warm in her bed. Once she's happy with her solo orgasms in bed, she might want to think about inviting you into bed to watch and share...

  • Why Women Think They Can't Orgasm   6 days 6 hours ago

    I am beyond words at how unbelievably happy I am I came across this post from a google search. I'm a 23 year old female, who has always felt like she couldn't have an orgasm. I was always the girl that none of the guys liked so when I was in college, I was so lonely, horny, and desparte I started sleeping with random guys just hoping one of them would know how to pleasure me. Theres been a lot of guys(something I'm not proud of, not because its wrong to have a lot of partners, but because I was doing for all the wrong reasons and wasn't being safe) and NONE of them really know/understand the kind of stimulation and expericence a girl needs. I have always blamed the internet and lack of sex ed for my generations guys not knowing what theyre doing when it comes to sex(serioulsy I can only tell a guy so many times that just because the chick in the porn videos you watch can bend that way, doesn't mean every girl can). 
    I'm rambling sorry. My point I was trying to make was, I never took the time, even when maturbating, to just enjoy the good feelings. If I start feeling really good my focus immediatetly goes to "omg am i gonna have an orgasm how?!) and I never feel like I do. I l always attributed it to the fact that I have depression and anxiety and have never learned how to just turn my brain off and relax, mixed with any medication I was taking (my dr though says the medication I'm on shouldn't have that side effect?

    It was really nice to just read this and know that I'm not alone. I take so much comformt knowing that other girls are experiencing the same things and that means theres nothing wrong with me. I always felt like I wasn't going to be good enough for the right man one day if i couldn't have an orgasm. I thought I was just differernt than everyone else. I am so happy to know i'm not alone. 

    I apologize for the lengthy comment, but I just had to express my feelings and gratitude for your post! 

  • Nudity with Strangers Makes You Happy   6 days 6 hours ago

    It is so true if you only give it a chance. Too many women are still too self-concious and unable to give themselves permission to loosten up and explore.  However, the experience of being nude and exploring yourself in a group of non-judgemental, supportive strangers, even a small group, hs meant so much to me and I know many other women like myself.
    It breaks down all those preconceieved notions we hold that limit us from achiving the sexual and orgasmic capacity within us that is forever longing to express itself and lift us up.
    I've read that women who have allowed themselves these experiences, who are comfortable with themselves enough to be naked and masturbate with other supportive women, tend to be far more orgasmic and sexually satisfied down the road. Many actually go on to enjoy a highly orgasmic centered lifetyle and help other women toward the same.
    I, for one, am one of those women and proud of it!  Actually, nothing makes my husband more happy either than my orgasmic lifestyle either.  He's so understanding.

  • Learn a New Orgasm: How to Upgrade Your Masturbation Technique   6 days 7 hours ago

    Wow.  I never considered prostate massage but will definately try that now.
    Yes, I've read that 3 ejaculations a week is the absolute minimum for prostate health and overall sexual health as well.  However, the average guy these days exceeds that by far but it can certainly be a challange for older men or men with health conditions to maintain a healthy ejaculatory frequency. 
    I've read that most healthy men should actually strive for more than that if they seek improvement over just sustaining themselves and most do from the combination of sex and masturbation they enjoy.
    Prostate stimulation and eStimulation can enable an average, healthy man to sustain a lifestyle of several ejaculations a day which, to be honest, we all dream of whether we admit that or not. So it's no wonder that has become more popular. I'm looking forward to it.

  • I Got in My Bathtub & Turned the Facet on Full Blast, Slipped My Clit Under the Stream & Waited   6 days 13 hours ago

    Like the person two comments above, the girl I'm dating can only seem to reach orgasm via the bath tub currently. We both want her to be able to reach it while together but it is difficult for her right now and she becomes impatient and/or frustrated which in turn makes me feel bad as she can't quite get there. Anyways, I found this as I was searching & reading trying to find any way to somewhat simulate the feeling she gets from the water if I can. Any tips on how I can do this or things I can do to help her on her journey to not needing just the tub and being able to do it together would be appreciated! I know this is an old article...

  • I Got in My Bathtub & Turned the Facet on Full Blast, Slipped My Clit Under the Stream & Waited   6 days 13 hours ago

    Like the person two comments above, the girl I'm dating can only seem to reach orgasm via the bath tub currently. We both want her to be able to reach it while together but it is difficult for her right now and she becomes impatient and/or frustrated which in turn makes me feel bad as she can't quite get there. Anyways, I found this as I was searching & reading trying to find any way to somewhat simulate the feeling she gets from the water if I can. Any tips on how I can do this or things I can do to help her on her journey to not needing just the tub and being able to do it together would be appreciated! I know this is an old article...

  • Is It More Difficult for Large Women to Orgasm?   6 days 18 hours ago

    Betty,
    The woman clearly stated that she realizes that her weight is an issue. Instead of acknowledging that and moving forward with the topic the way you might with a person who has another body issue or even a disability, you focused solely on her eating behaviors, shaming her further. 
    I'm truly disappointed in you. 
    Yes, her weight may be a serious health issue. You know what else may be leading to those patterns of overeating and other behaviors linked to weight gain and obesity? Depression and stress. In fact, some of that stress may be from the relationship, which may be brought on by an unsatisfactory sex life... which you have the power and knowledge to help with, but instead opted to chastise her and give her the same advice that every fat woman has heard over and over in their life. 
    Your response was lazy and dripping with personal bias. 
    I used to truly respect you and enjoy your work. Now I can see you're just like everyone else. 

    L

  • How Do I Maintain My Erection?   1 week 14 hours ago

    Your response the "nail right on the head" for me. Married for 42 years, my wife has become increasingly lazy with sex. For the first ten years, she was a tiger in bed. Then as her body weight increased, she lost interest in all things active...including sex.

    Frequency dropped way below the norm for couples our age. She even got to the point where she would change the TV channel if a program suddenly showed scene with a woman in a bikini or underwear.
    Sexually, she became the taker and I became the giver. She basically laid there and dictated what I would do to her. It finally reached the point where she stated that vaginal dryness hurt her too much for penetration, and all she wanted was a quick dry hump. She doesn't even want oral because it makes her cum more than once.
    It has become difficult for me to maintain an erection with someone who just wants to "get it over with". I've bought her a couple of vibrators to bring some fun into our sex life, but she got indignant and won't even open them.  She's perfectly happy with sex twice a year...even if she doesn't need it.
    What is one to do? Have I spoiled her? Has she lost all interest in me because I'm here and too available?  She is totally absorbed in reading romance novels. Maybe I just can't compete with her imagination?

  • Soft Penetration is a Great Way to Deepen Our Connection   1 week 2 days ago

    Sorry for my question, I'm not english speaking and I don't understand what you mean when you reffer to ' a man can let his partner penetrate him' you mean anal penetration?

  • The Absence of Pleasure Leads to Systemic Violence   1 week 3 days ago

    thank you for all these supportive comments.  We're making out way through this minus a week of sleep plus a few arguments. 

    You're all so right.  When I look at Grayson and he smiles back at me I know that I'm a great mom and it will all work out.  I just have to let go and let it run its course.  

    <3 

  • Something About a Woman in Leather on a Bike   1 week 4 days ago

    Some guys say it's really beautiful, but I don't see anything spectacular in that. I feel more excited when a woman is working with a laptop with http://customwritingcompany.com/. It can be a housewife with a cup of coffee. Besides, leather is taken from poor animals.

  • The Absence of Pleasure Leads to Systemic Violence   1 week 6 days ago

    Be confident in the love you feel for your child and for your parenting skills which are manifold. 

    Both will be very clear to the ACS (child welfare) whatever or whoever caused their visit.

    Do not let yourself become fearful or to doubt - your child needs your confidence, your openess and delight in him and in life. 

    Think of the most important lessons that you wish your child to learn: love, gentleness, kindness, strength, confidence, open hearted and open minded. 

    Know that you are loved, within your family and beyond. You are the delight of your son's life, his strength and tenderness.

    Live your life accordingly.