Lifestyle

We feel amazing and had to share our experience with colon health...and that lead to anal play ;)

Sometimes you just want to pay to have the job done by a pro who knows what he's doing and then he goes away until you call him for the next time.  No hounding, obsessive phone calls, love notes.  Just a good fuck when you're in the mood:

It's not just men who pay prostitutes to sleep with them. For some women, paying for sex is more convenient than cruising bars and clubs trying to find men. "They don't want to be found out. They want to do something private - it's their own world, a part of their life that they want to be secret."

Nicole runs a high-class escort agency in the West Midlands, whose clients include women as well as men. Her male escorts host "in-calls" for female clients at a large country cottage, three quarters of a mile away from the nearest town. The exterior gives no clue as to what goes on inside and instead looks more like a French chalet.

Esther's article below addresses my most frequently asked question. All married and committed couples need to read her book "Mating in Captivity." I solved the problem by moving along which is a luxury that most couples don't have, especially with children:

While the diversity in the couples I work with is infinite, one complaint rings true across all cultures: couples who describe themselves as loving, trusting and caring complain that their sex lives have become dull and devoid of eroticism.

Why is it that great sex so often fades for couples who claim to love each other as much as ever? Can we want what we already have? Why does good intimacy not guarantee great sex? Why is the forbidden erotic? Why does the transition to parenthood deliver such an erotic blow? And when we love what do we feel and when we desire how is it different?

These are some of the questions that occupied me when I set out to the nature of erotic desire in long-term relationships for my book Mating In Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic. I wanted to look at the obstacles and anxieties we experience when our quest for secure love clashes with our pursuit of passion.

I'm 35 and I can't wait to be 40.  I look at my contemporaries - Angelina, Drew, Cameron, Jennifer - and they look more beautiful and confident now than they did in their 20s.  It's a shame that our culture prizes youth over wisdom.  Betty always says that she hit her sexual stride in her 40s.  Watch out world here I come.

 Jane Polden, a psychotherapist who specialises in working with middle-aged women, says it's a story she hears time and again, as does relationship psychologist Susan Quilliam, co-author of The New Joy of Sex. "There's plenty of research that shows sex gets better for women as they get older," says Quilliam. "It's one of the best-kept secrets of women's lives."

Betty's staying with me while her renovations are finishing up and last night we watched Towelhead on demand.  It is the best movie we've seen on the coming of age of a 13 year old girl.  It hits everything: the humiliation of getting your period which symbolizes the potential for your motherhood which is supposed to be revered but is denigrated...finding a stash of porn that gets you hot and being called a slut for liking it...and losing your virginity to an adult male who gropes you with no emotional connection but his exaggerated horniness and your innocent curiosity.  The scene of her rubbing her legs together masturbating in the classroom was brilliant:

I never endorse products but when I got the email announcing the Hanky Panky Thong sale I knew I had to post it.  This is my dream thong.  I have 15 pair.  It took me 2 years and several dissapointing experiences with scratchy lace up my ass to find this perfect itch free, totally comfortable (even in the gym), like-your-naked, sexy-as-hell thong. 

And Herroom, our sponsor, is offering the ultimate promotion. Purchase any 3 Hanky Panky panties and recieve a free Hanky Panky 3511 Thong in Shocking Pink/Carnation. Click here to order yours.  You won't be disappointed.  Even my mom is hooked ;)

This piece from ABC News is exactly what we'll be talking about in our Valentine's Day video podcast this Friday. There are many different kinds of love and gender/orientation/sexuality have very little to do with any of it.

In a society obsessed with sex, David Jay wants no part of it. Jay, a 26-year-old graduate student at the Presidio School of Management in San Francisco, acknowledges that his lack of interest in sex may seem unusual to many who view intercourse as the epitome of intimacy.

But research suggests that about 1 percent of the population may share Jay's view on sex. And he said that for many of these people, coming to terms with their feelings about sex can be a major challenge.

I grew up with images of women that were strong, sexual, and independent. First of all, my mother adored Mae West and my nickname was "Betty Boop".

The modern Hollywood portrayal of women is increasingly a heroine who is hysterical, weight-obsessed and only thinks of men, an Oxford academic claims.

Dr Diane Purkiss, a feminist historian and fellow of Oxford University , has argued that over the past five decades the movie industry has made its female leads 'dumber and dumber'.

She suggests that these cartoon protagonists are merely reflecting a decline in our own culture into one that, for women, is image-obsessed.

Dr Purkiss referred to latest chick flicks such as He's Just NOt That Into You and Confessions of a Shopaholic.

They fell into the 'worst king of regressive, pre-feminist stereotype of misogynistic cliche'.

Below is a fan email we received from a medical student who is sexually liberated. She will be such a credit to her profession:

Dear Betty & Carlin,

Today my life has changed. Today I discovered your website and I have viewed several of your videos discussing female sexuality and pleasure. I have LONG made many of the same arguments and comments that you discuss in your videos and it has been the absolute most exhilarating thing to see that I am not alone!

I am a medical student in my fourth year of med school. While I consider myself a feminist I have never formally participated in feminist organizations or sex-positive clubs. Frankly, the women that I know in these types of groups always struck me as, well, unsexy. They seemed like over-the-top belligerent feminists with thin skins and strange customs. My feminist classmates would make posters about abortion rights, show videos by Eve Ensler and hold discussions on womens health. None of these things held any attraction for me, despite my strong beliefs in the area of female sexuality.

This is very helpful.  I learned the hard way that you should always break up in public.  Zagat has created a guide to the best places to dump your date. New Zagat guide lists the best breakup restaurants.

You can eat great food and still make a great escape. "From 'be mine' to 'let's just be friends,' selecting the right place for a date makes all the difference," the guide's description says.

Earlier this week, a court in Delhi - ah, of all places, in the "happening" capital! - threw out the case against a young, married couple who were picked up by police allegedly for kissing near a railway station.

News television hyperventilated, serving up titillation and tattle in equal measure on the serial-kissing Hollywood actor. Some protesters burnt effigies of Gere; others shouted slogans demanding the death of the hapless Shetty. It took the Supreme Court to suspend an arrest warrant against Gere, and obscenity charges against Shetty.

This week I received a message on facebook from Kim Wald a high school friend that I hadn't heard from in years. It's so great to reconnect and hear her memories of me in high school: 

"Carlin, I checked out your web site, and let me tell you I am so impressed, what a wonderful job you and Betty are doing... Good for you! I will be checking out your page on a regular basis for sure. So funny though, when i think back to high school, even before i saw your page, I always thought of one specific memory asscociated with you... sitting in the hs cafateria, a bunch of girls sitting around you paying rapt attention, while you gave out advice about sex and sexuality! Everybody came to you and you were so beyond your years ;) You were good then, and you are amazing now! If someone asked me what career you would have chosen, I would have nailed it.... so good for you."

Last Saturday Betty and I had a private session with an African woman who had been circumcised.  Her name is Badu.  She found us through our work with Clitoraid, an organization that is paying for these women to have genital reconstruction. The hope is that this surgery may help the 140,000,000 women who've been mutiliated. It was the most amazing experience of my life.  I'm so grateful to have done this with Betty and for us to be able to share it with you. Betty and I wrote separate essays and Badu is writing hers too:

My First Circumcised African Woman

The Witness: Observing Betty's First Circumcised African Woman

Now I'm craving asparagus:

Got our Atheist Bus Campaign t-shirts and had to wear them on camera: