Do Not Do This to Your Horny Offspring

Wed, 01/02/2013 - 08:46
Submitted by LilithLand

Sorry folks, I have been such a no-show. Once again, I am caught in dissertation hell.

I found this video and decided to post it. Here is how NOT to be an enlightened parent.

Okay picture this, you're a kid in the privacy of your own room getting down with your bad self. Mid-wank session --who should walk in but Mom -- in all her Stepford mom glory. MOTHERS DO NOT DO THIS TO YOUR HORNY OFFSPRING!

In this unintentionally hilarious (and serious) sex ed video, Mom sticks around to lecture the kid (in a sex positive way) on masturbation -- right before he blows a load. Oh, she means well, but her timing is all wrong. Only one time did my mother accidentally walk in on me, and she had the good sense to turn around and walk out! Mid-wank is not the time to have a heart to heart sex talk.

This is one of the weirdest sex ed videos from the 1970s. Obviously, this mother has read too many child development books without really absorbing the information. In real life, start talking about sex early and in the proper context.

Women, Sex, Culture & Relationships

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Horny offspring

Thu, 01/03/2013 - 00:56

Lilith, thanks. Where did you find this oldie? Mom looks spacy, but at least she's kind and lets her kid get back to where he left off. Even though she sounds as if she's reading a textbook, I'd far rather have had this woman give me a sex talk than my 'You'll go to Hell if you touch it' Catholic parents. It sounds as if your own parents were on the more enlightened side. This mom really should have done what yours did and said, 'Sorry!',  and quietly stepped out. As you said, she means well, but part of what she intended to speak to her son about is how to 'control' these feelings rather than just enjoy them. The subtext is that sexual pleasure is not something to indulge in 'too often', and might even be not quite respectable or even somehow dangerous. I wonder what the video mom went on to say? Anyway, it sure could have been handled worse.

I can't recall where I found

LilithLand's picture
Sat, 01/05/2013 - 01:04

I can't recall where I found this; I just thought it was an absolute hoot. As for my mother, well, I was doing the wild thing in the bathtub at the time, and I am not sure she even knew what was up. It was one of those things where you unexpectedly catch someone in the bathroom and quickly close the door. My mother was not very open minded about masturbation at all. I seriously doubt she ever wanked. So sad. 

Wow, another era back then

Sat, 01/05/2013 - 01:43

It really was another era, wasn't it? At least the producers were trying to be relatively enlightened, even though it came off almost like a weird comedy routine. You're probably right about your mom being clueless when she walked in on you. And it's too bad she didn't have a more accepting attitude about herself. My parents weren't sex-positive either; if they had been, we'd have had a happier household. I hope the sex-ed and parenting videos of today are even as sex-positive as this vintage one was, but with the evil influence of the far right, I'm not so sure.

It was indeed a very weird

LilithLand's picture
Tue, 01/08/2013 - 02:01

It was indeed a very weird video. I have wondered if it wasn't for some funny, satiric reason. As for my mom, I seriously doubt she would have understood the mechanics of bathtub masturbation. And I seriously doubt she ever wanked herself. Maybe she did, but she was pretty uptight all the same.

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.