Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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Imagine that you walk down the beach with army boots on. You wouldn’t have a clue what the ocean, the sand, the foamy bubbles, the air, feels like against your bare skin. You might assume wrongly that people don’t feel much at the beach at all. In fact, you might even assume that everybody wears army boots to the ocean just like you, or at the very least that everybody should.

One of the flaws in the workings of our brains is that we assume that everybody is like us. We assume that we somehow have the experience of “objective”, accurate reality and share that reality with everybody else. This is a huge mistake in our perception. We want to believe that people think and behave like us, and that our experiences are objective, but they are not.

The human brain is a complex interpreter of reality and experience - not a simple wax tablet replicator of it. Our interpretations of our experiences play a part in the determination of our model of reality.

That’s what’s so awesomely revealing about the pope coming out of the closet last week and saying that child rape was considered normal back in the day. It confirms my theory that he is one sick mofo who has normalized abuse in his life, and projected that sickness on all the other children of the world. The pope, through his own abuse, guilt, denial and justification, has assumed that all children are the same in how they will handle abuse and trauma. "In the 1970s, paedophilia was theorised as something fully in conformity with man and even with children," the pope said.

The pope makes the mistake that, because he’s lived through abuse, and he has become the pope after all, abuse must be good, or at least have a neutral affect upon kids.

The fact that this international psycho continues to be allowed to spread his worldly wisdom - without massive outcry and outrage - illustrates to me just how out of touch we are with the most basic rights of children.

Alice Miller, a long time advocate of the rights of children, defines childhood abuse and mistreatment as follows:

“Humiliations, spankings and beatings, slaps in the face, betrayal, sexual exploitation, derision, neglect, etc. are all forms of mistreatment, because they injure the integrity and dignity of a child, even if their consequences are not visible right away. However, as adults, most abused children will suffer, and let others suffer, from these injuries. This dynamic of violence can deform some victims into hangmen who take revenge even on whole nations and become willing executors to dictators as unutterably appalling as Hitler and other cruel leaders. Beaten children very early on assimilate the violence they endured, which they may glorify and apply later as parents, in believing that they deserved the punishment and were beaten out of love. They don't know that the only reason for the punishments they have ( or in retrospect, had) to endure is the fact that their parents themselves endured and learned violence without being able to question it. Later, the adults, once abused children, beat their own children and often feel grateful to their parents who mistreated them when they were small and defenseless.

This is why society's ignorance remains so immovable and parents continue to produce severe pain and destructively - in all "good will", in every generation. Most people tolerate this blindly because the origins of human violence in childhood have been and are still being ignored worldwide. Almost all small children are smacked during the first three years of life when they begin to walk and to touch objects which may not be touched. This happens at exactly the time when the human brain builds up its structure and should thus learn kindness, truthfulness, and love but never, never cruelty and lies. Fortunately, there are many mistreated children who find "helping witnesses" and can feel loved by them.”

Yes, It’s true that the bible sanctions abuse, but it’s time we wake up and realize, it’s just a book written by people who themselves were abused. The bible is justification for the continuing cycle of abuse begetting abuse.

When psycho-pope feels safe enough to express his stunning ideas out loud, thinking that there’s no problem with them, all I can think is that his compass of what is normal, right, and justified is far askew. It becomes impossible for me to accept anything that comes out of his mouth as making any sense at all - especially for the billions of people around the world who listen to his every word as if it had meaningful wisdom from the mouth of god.

When these things about child abuse come out with the pope, it gives us insight into his internal landscape - and it’s not good. When it comes to kids, the pope should be deemed completely unsafe, unreliable, and just plain old creepy in his ideas - and he needs to stop or step down.

Based on what he’s already said, it’s no wonder the pope feels justified in covering up molestations and allegations against pedophile priests, and why it’s been such a stretch for him to understand that it’s not OK to expose kids to sexual abuse. He seems to lack the basic understanding that kids must be protected from pedophile priests.

It seems like he’s saying, “Hey, if sexual abuse is good enough for the pope, then it’s certainly good enough for the kids.”

For most kids, the trauma of abuse doesn’t just go away. The pope, in his army boots walking along the beach, lacks understanding that children are affected by abuse, and that it can destroy people’s lives.

As a teenager, I was told that children don’t remember things until after the age of 6. I however remember being tied down in the hospital room, while getting stitches in my ear. The staff didn’t think that a 4 year old would remembered anything, so they didn’t anesthetize my ear. They just began stitching. I remember every horrible detail of it. I can still feel the stick of the needle, the tug of my ear cartilage, the look of non-caring in the doctor’s eyes behind his mask, the nurse holding my head down, the tightness of the straps, the tears pouring down the sides of my face, my gasping for air.

That experience haunted and horrified me for decades. I still get claustrophobic when I’m confined in any way.

Children do remember, even if only at a subconscious level. There is scientific evidence emerging that children are even learning about the outside world from inside the womb. A child’s little brain is learning and aware, but it is vulnerable and susceptible to all kinds of horrors of life.

Sex, especially with creepy priests, is absolutely something children must be protected from regardless of what the pope, the bible, or the Vatican believes.