We had an Incredible Virtual Sex Session & When We "Disconnected" I Felt Valued

Tue, 06/17/2014 - 08:56
Submitted by Just a Cam Model

Working from home, online, as a webcam model has given me a glimpse into the sexual psyche of close to 100,000 men. And it’s given me the chance to look into my own.

I’ve made a commitment to be my authentic self, to be there (here) because I want to, not for the money, although it has become my sole source of income. I remind myself that I have enough in the bank to live for several years…I’m just doing the eat/pray/love thing for the moment.

Orgasm: what it is, what it does, when we do it, where we do it, how we do it, who we do it with, and why we do it is always on my mind. Talk about a mind-fuck.

In my experience, most men will cum within 2 minutes of seeing me naked. Most men say they want to see me cum. Or they say “Cum for me.” Very few men say they “need to” see me cum before they can…the ones who do generally mean it. And I can take a “long time” to cum. The fact that I say that is part of the problem. Most men believe that women will come within 3 minutes, because so many women (& most in the adult entertainment business) fake an orgasm within that amount of time to “please” the man. I do not do that.

I do not fake orgasms and I tell them I won’t. They know they are paying to see me naked, no promises of anything else. I get requests to squirt too – that’s a whole other topic of me explaining to them that squirting does not equal orgasm. So much work to do. Anyway, if someone has the time (& money) to hang in there with me for probably at least 20 minutes, he may get to see me cum. I’d say out of the 100,000 men I’ve cammed with, I have climaxed a dozen times.

The time on cam has become my foreplay and my self-pleasuring after I log off is my coreplay. That’s when I settle in; grateful for all that I have, close my eyes, draw on all my experiences, and come up with the hottest fantasy to enjoy the ride to Wonderland.

Last night was one of the nights where I actually came on cam. It was with a man (let’s call him “NYCHardGuy”) who said he wanted to see me cum. He’d been asking for it for a few months, spending about $600 on shows hoping to catch one of the all illusive real female orgasms. A few times prior to this night he had made comments that rubbed me the wrong way.

I had had a Band-Aid on my nose for a couple weeks from my skin cancer surgery, but cammed anyway. I honestly thought that ‘my guys’ wouldn’t mind, that they were really into my shows for me, my essence, my sexuality, my body and that the boo-boo on my face wouldn’t matter. (It actually did matter as I noticed a significant decrease in viewership – shallow men). Anyway, NYCHardGuy was not understanding on multiple occasions when I honestly told him that I didn’t feel like having an orgasm, because my nose was healing (and why do I need to explain??? Why isn’t no, not tonight, good enough? – feminist rant).

I was still on cam, able to interact with them, get naked, play with myself a little, watch them if they wanted to do cam-2-cam with me (where I witness them masturbating), but I didn’t feel that I had enough energy to put into a full-blown masturbation session for myself. I guess that concept is foreign to them as their energy levels and testosterone fuels them in a completely different way. It doesn’t take much for them to feel desire, and as long as they feel physically safe, that energy rises to their cocks and voila, done. For me and most women, our desire comes from the top down.

We have to not only see something we desire, we have to feel seen & heard, we have to feel emotionally safe, we have to feel “met” at a certain level, then we can relax into it and our sexual energy can peak. Maybe that’s why it’s easier on our own. So anyway, last night NYCHardGuy happened to come into my room when I was already quite worked up after having cammed with another member for about 15 minutes and not cumming. Again NYCHardGuy was a bit snarky.

I decided to ignore that and focus on my own body, I was very aroused so I thought I would just close my eyes, focus on that, enjoy myself and he would be lucky to see what was about to happen. I have massive orgasms. They last about 2 minutes…for me that’s huge. I haven’t seen too many women cum, but for me they are really powerful and have gotten more so the older I get. Bigger, better, longer…just fucking wonderful!

Last night….I did. I came. I exploded. I felt so good. NYCHardGuy then said “Is that all you got? You have any more fuel in the tank? Pound that pussy now.” WTF??? Seriously? Did he not get how amazing that was? Was he so used to seeing fake orgasms, that he didn’t appreciate a real one when he saw it? Or was it something else? Did he need to see the penetration to imagine himself penetrating me? Can men not imagine? Do they really need to see it?

Their minds really are pornographic. I can’t judge that. But his words and his tone in text rang to me as being unappreciative. I’ve had other men, who after seeing me cum, are absolutely in awe. They stay in the room with me after for several minutes. We have virtual pillow talk.

I know they desired me, we had an incredible virtual sex session and when we "disconnected" I felt valued. And that feels best.

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Thank you

Tue, 06/17/2014 - 10:39
Dotty (not verified)

for sharing your experiences. Wonderful text! 
I love when you say:
 

"We have to not only see something we desire, we have to feel seen & heard, we have to feel emotionally safe, we have to feel “met” at a certain level, then we can relax into it and our sexual energy can peak."

When I met a new lover a few months ago and when we had phone-sex the first time, I had an incredible orgasm while my partner didnt do anything but listening silently to my descriptions of what I was doing to my vulva. I felt so appreciated, encouraged, heard, held and accepted by him and of course safe that when I was already moaning, breathing heavyly and near exstasy he finally told me: Let go! ... I just exploded.

Webcam nastiness

Tue, 06/17/2014 - 17:20

Wow. I don't know what to make of Cam Model's submission. When we solicit the attention of random strangers, we're going to get a complete sampling of people, from respectful and nice ones to narcissistic jerks. If we're asking for money from them, some of them are going to be even more demanding, and sometimes in nasty ways. And in truth, a sampling of customers who are paying for a webcam show isn't a random sample of men. Men who have instant orgasms from one glimpse of a naked body, understand nothing about women, and rudely demand an orgasm from a person who isn't feeling well? No wonder you're cynical.

It obviously feels much better to have a polite, appreciative person as a customer, so why not ban the likes of NYCHardGuy and only keep the customers who treat you well? You don't have to allow those demanding jerks into your virtual home. From what you say about your bank account you can afford to be more selective, and wouldn't it be worth the peace of mind?

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