Betty Dodson's blog

I Don't Want To Hurt His Ego By Not Coming

Mon, 10/10/2011 - 08:24
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I was looking up things on youtube and I ran into you and Dodson. I have to say, I became very intrigued and wanted to check out your website. I need help, I am in a new relationship with a wonderful man! Romantic, loving, caring, an all around great person. When he touches me, just traces his hand down my chest ever so slightly, I get wet, soaked. His kisses do the same thing! He is extremely knowledgeable. But when it comes to actually playing with me, whether he decides to keep touching me, lick me, finger me... I have a very hard time having an orgasm. I have had them, but not that many. He is afraid that he is no good, and that maybe he can't satisfy me. I've told him though, it's not you, it's me. And it is.

She's Sexually Repressed. I'm Sexually Open

Sat, 10/08/2011 - 14:12
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Good day to you Betty!

First things first I want to apologize for asking a potentially useless batch of questions, but I couldn't seem to find the answers to them while searching around your site. You see, I am seventeen years old, and have just recently given up my virginity to the love of my life. I've given her multiple orgasms through both hand and oral stimulation over the course of our dating, but she feels inadequate because she has only given me a single orgasm (the day I lost my virginity) (and that was after around a two day period of screwing, and I ended up having to stimulate my own clit in order to come).

My Favorite Steve Jobs Quote

Thu, 10/06/2011 - 11:13
Submitted by Betty Dodson

"You're time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.  Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living the life of other people's thinking.  Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your inner voice.  And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.  They somehow already know what you truly want to become.  Everything else is secondary."

This is the artist's I've lived my life for 83 years. 

How Do I Let Guys Know I'd Like To Have Sex?

Wed, 10/05/2011 - 13:37
Submitted by Betty Dodson

So Betty,

I am young. I've never had sex, or given a hand/blow job or anything. The farthest I've gone is made out. And, I am curious how to make myself seem available to the boys around me. How should I go about showing them that I'm not a prude little girl? But, I don't want to be seen as a whore. I just want to show men that I am willing to preform sex acts.

Thanks, A

Dear A,

Occupy Wall Street is Spreading

Tue, 10/04/2011 - 15:31
Submitted by Betty Dodson

You can't imagine how thrilling it was for me that #occupywallstreet is spreading city by city - if this is happening in my hometown of Wichita, the revolution is a done deal!

Wichita is often used by PR firms to test the market for products as the essence of the heartland of America, like lots of religion and down home values.

The 99% now have a voice in Wichita!

I'm on my way to Wichita to visit my brother Dick and his wife Barbara in Fall River, Kansas, (a wide place in the road) about an hour and a half outside Wichita. They live on a mile acre of land in a very special house that my baby brother built. I'll be coming from Houston TX after receiving an award from Quad S November 4th. More details to follow.

Is Female Orgasm a "Lukewarm Leftover"?

Tue, 10/04/2011 - 08:50
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Today I read a recent post by Dan Savage entitled "Broken".

The question begins with: "I am a 23-year-old female, sexually active for seven years, and I can’t reach climax. I am extremely frustrated..."

Dan Savage quotes Tracy Clark-Flory who discusses the evolutionary 'by-product theory'. According to this theory, "the female orgasm is an evolutionary hand-me-down—or, more cynically, lukewarm leftovers".

I was wondering what you thought of this Dan Savage column and the 'by-product' theory.

Thanks Betty!

Dear T,

If I Masturbate Will I Ejaculate Too Soon During Sex?

Mon, 10/03/2011 - 16:34
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I'm a 25yr old single male. I've been single for 2yrs now, and have not had sex in those 2yrs. It hasn't been easy. I've had the opportunity to have a few one night stands but I haven't gone through with it. That's just not my thing and I'd prefer it to be with someone that I'm in a relationship with.

Long story short, self-pleasure has been my only release. I do this 3-4 times a week on average. Sometimes I masturbate on a daily basis. Lately I've been wondering if this is a bad thing. When I do meet someone and become intimate with them, will I be so used to masturbating that I ejaculate quickly? I feel like I've set myself up for embarrassment and that I should lay off masturbating for a while now. Any advice?

Dear S,

Is My Mouth Too Small For Oral Sex?

Mon, 10/03/2011 - 16:32
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I have just made the recent horrific discovery that my mouth is really small...I'm concerned that I won't actually be able to fit a penis in my mouth for blowjobs. Help?!

Dear M,

If that's the worst problem you ever encounter, you can still have a great sexlife! I'd be more concerned about receiving good oralsex than giving it. If you hold a man's penis with your hand covered with lube and use your tongue to tease his glans, few men will ever complain. Meanwhile nothing wrong with opening and stretching your mouth including exercising your tongue muscle. I'll bet there is a book somewhere that goes into details about this. "Google that shit" as we say around the office here at D&R.

Dr. Betty

Should I Have My Prostate Checked After 50?

Mon, 10/03/2011 - 16:32
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

Thank you for your reply! I am very glad your internet page is there! After weeks of surfing the internet I find your approach is the only serious one and there is going beyond what can be found in books (!). - I am loosing a lot of energy when ejaculating. I can feel it for days. It puts me in bad mood. I find that some ejaculate too much. One can see it. They look old with 35. I find rapid ejaculating without listening to the body is a form of violence on ones own body. I find pleasuring without wanting anything but being with what can be sensed, can be a tremendous experience.

Former Abuse Keeps Me from Good Sex

Mon, 10/03/2011 - 16:31
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I, like many other women am sure, have been sexually abused. I was very promiscuous for quite some time, and still like random fucking every now and again. My problem is is that I find myself in situations with men that I am not really interested in and end up getting involved, sexually, because of either manipulation, my vulnerability, and/or lack of major boundary skills.
For the most part, these relationships are extremely one sided.. I rarely get off and then feel pretty shitty afterwards for allowing myself to be in that situation. I would love some advice (perhaps a video?) on dealing with this type of stuff. I understand that just speaking up etc is what I need to do, but what if that, in itself, is extremely hard while still being very sexual? Help!!

Will a Guy Have Trouble Staying Inside Me during Sex?

Mon, 10/03/2011 - 16:29
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr Betty!,

Here I go with another question for you. This one is about vaginal tightness. I have noticed when I use a bigger toy, it doesn't stay in. It's like my vagina pushes it out. This gets annoying when I want that full feeling when I orgasm, but always have to keep pushing it back in. Will this be an issue in a partner sex situation? Will I push him out of me? Or will I be so tight that it's uncomfortable for him? (I'm not being overly concerned with 'him', I already know full well that it's not going to be absolutely comfortable for me.) I also have another question about a subject I know you loathe!

Is Porn the Reason for Lower Rape Rates?

Mon, 10/03/2011 - 07:37
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

My coworker and I were discussing the crime reports in our local newspaper (yes, I still read the old-fashioned, newsprint-on-the-hands newspaper). She and I are both in our mid-forties and we noticed that the instances of stranger rape seemed to not be a prevalent as they were in the seventies and eighties. I don't mean to belittle anyone's experiences with rape but it just seems like stranger-jumped-out-at-me rape either has decreased in our area (Baltimore suburbs) or it is not being reported in the media.

When I Stopped Drinking I Lost My Orgasm

Fri, 09/30/2011 - 09:20
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dr. Betty,

I know you get this question of "I've tried everything, but I still can't orgasm," but I'm asking again...I'm 28, have had twenty something partners and have been married for a year now. I know you say some people just don't recognize it, but I really don't think it's happening. It NEVER has, at least not sober. It's gotten to a point where I don't even want to have sex. I mean, for what? I believe it really makes my husband think he's inadequate, but it's ME...quick facts about our relationship: I used to drink heavily and had lots of sex under the influence and I used to soak the sheets!