Betty Dodson's blog

Oral Sex or Using My Fingers Won't Make Me Orgasm

Mon, 01/16/2012 - 14:01
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I am 37 and have amazing orgasms only when my partner hits my g-spot through vaginal intercourse, or when I stimulate my clitoris area under a running water faucet in the bath. Even what feels like the most amazing oral sex or my own efforts to stimulate my clitoris (using fingers or vibrators) doesn't get me to an orgasm. I know clitoral orgasm is possible because of my experience with the faucet, but I can't seem to get there any other way. My partner is very generous with oral sex and I would like to orgasm from that. Help!

Dear K,

I Used to Orgasm by Rubbing Myself on the Edge of a Table.

Mon, 01/16/2012 - 10:32
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

Hi, I'm 18 years old and have been masturbating since I was about 8. I usually "balanced" on the edge of things like tables and stuff and could always orgasm that way. Well I started getting sexually active over a year ago and have never orgasmed with him. We have tried everything--clit stimulation, hitting g spot-- a bunch of different positions, but I never get there.

I feel good at times and usually feel like I have to pee at some point and once or twice have gotten a severe tickling sensation I couldn't stand-it was almost painful...what's going on with me?????? Oh and now I dont masturbate much so now I'm having issues climaxing that way too! I'm soooo sick of no orgasms! HELP!

Dear B,

Are The Stories About Vaginal Wall Muscle Control True?

Sun, 01/15/2012 - 08:47
Submitted by Betty Dodson


I have heard about women who have enough control of their vaginal wall muscles that they can shoot ping-pong balls out. I have heard about a Korean/Chinese/Japanese adult show where a gal can insert a peeled banana and asks a guy how many pieces he wants it broken into and proceeds to do it while it is inside. Is this really possible? I can barely feel my wife's muscles contract when she reaches orgasm but she does not have good muscle control anywhere on her body. One guy posted something his girlfriend does on a dick that she can give the equivalent of a hand job with her vulva. I would guess that pelvic floor exercises (Kegels) may help out on this front. Are these shows/rumors true? How do I get my wife interested in doing these, for both my pleasure and hers?

Why I Believe Antidepressants Don't Work

Wed, 01/11/2012 - 09:46
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I'm not going to back down on my belief that antidepressants are overprescribed. I stumbled upon an article by Dr. Levine, a psychologist, who argues that america's mental health industry is a threat to our sanity:

“Prior to psychiatry’s proclamation that depression was caused by too little of the neurotransmitter serotonin, few Americans were taking antidepressants. But by declaring that depression was caused by a serotonin imbalance analogous to diabetes and an insulin imbalance, depressed Americans became far more receptive to serotonin-enhancing drugs such as the “selective-serotonin-reuptake inhibitors” (SSRIs) Prozac, Paxil, and Zoloft.

My Penis Is Only Erect on One Side

Tue, 01/10/2012 - 09:46
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Do you have any knowledge about what can be done about peroni's condition. One side of my penis no longer engorges at erection. It curves to one side, is shorter than it used to be and is not as big around. I saw a urologist a few years ago who said there was not much that could be done about it. He said the surgery that some had tried was not very successful. It definitely limits the kind of things my wife and I can do together. Do you know of anything that can be done.

Dear K,

What Am I...Sexually?

Mon, 01/09/2012 - 09:32
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I’ve been struggling with my sexual orientation for a couple of years and am wondering, if you, knowledgeable and esteemed lady :-), might have a word or two of advice, as I don’t seem to be able to get anywhere on my own.

My Boyfriend Can't Make Me Come

Sat, 01/07/2012 - 13:45
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I am 19 and just under a year ago i found your website i brought myself to orgasm for the first time, using circular motions with my hand over my clitoral hood. My clitoris itself is too sensitive to touch directly. I have only been able to orgasm from this method, even when my boyfriend performs oral on me, i only feel a tickling feeling or if he gets too close to my actual clit it hurts, this is disheartening as alot of women seem to report that oral sex feels really good.

Do you have any suggestions as to exploring different ways to orgasm?, i feel very limited and depressed over the subject. If i invested in a vibrator would that change things? i am scared that i would become dependant on the vibrator to orgasm.

Thanks A

Dear A,

I Now Feel My Orgasms Anally

Tue, 01/03/2012 - 09:38
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I'm in my mid 30's and have been having orgasms since I was a teenager. During my 20's I had very low libido but have found that things are changing now! But I've been feeling orgasms differently now than I used to. Not all the time, but often, I will feel them in my bottom. Instead of feeling the contractions in my vagina, I feel it in my anus. I do like it and find it interesting, but I haven't been able to find any information on why this is suddenly happening. Until I felt it, I had no idea you could feel an orgasm there. Is this common? Thanks for your advice!

Dear K,

Great Orgasms Before Anti-Depressants. How Do I Get Back There?

Mon, 01/02/2012 - 09:01
Submitted by Betty Dodson


First off, I'm a huge fan of your blog and have been reading your work(Betty) since I was 12!

My question is regarding the intensity and type of orgasms I have since starting anti-depressants.

I never had any orgasms till I started a long-term relationship. Though I had masturbated as a child (rubbing against things, the classic) I never came during sex. However, after exploring and experimenting I found I could have dynamite orgasms during penetration, oral, with my hands and with a vibrator. It was great! I felt like a champ and was fully satisfied sexually.

I'm Wet, Trembling & Breathing Hard But No Orgasm?

Fri, 12/30/2011 - 09:28
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I am 19, almost 20, and I have never reached orgasm. I know I shouldn't but it's getting to the point that it really frustrates me. I have tried masturbating many times, using my hands and using a vibrator but it just doesn't seem to be my thing. It works for a bit but just levels out into nothing. I'm comfortable with it but just don't like it. The more personal contact I have with another person the more uninhibited and turned on I get.

My boyfriend of going on a year now tries all the time, it has become his goal to make me orgasm. He's the only thing that seems to almost get me there.

Searching for The Cause of Vulvodynia

Thu, 12/29/2011 - 08:50
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I wrote to you a while ago asking you why you thought I was afraid of sex/men, and whether it had anything to do with the pain I'd experienced for years as a result of having a thick hymen, or perhaps my issues with my father. You published it under the title 'Hymen removed, now afraid of sex" or something along those lines. Anyway, I have since been diagnosed with vulvodynia and I now have a new question for you.

I know you're not a vulvodynia expert, and that no-one really knows what causes this horrible disorder, but I have a theory and would like your opinion on it.

Think Anti-Depressants are Affecting My Orgasms

Thu, 12/29/2011 - 08:49
Submitted by Betty Dodson

I was browsing your website the other day, (I discovered it about two months ago and I feel like the people on this website are reading my mind) and I came across an article where you mentioned that ten years of anti-depressant usage will affect your ability to orgasm. This freaked me out because I am 18, just discovering my sexuality, and I never knew that anti-depressants can affect your orgasm. I have always been a sexual person, I've masturbated since I was about ten or so, but I've just started having partner sex. I've usually been able to reach orgasm pretty fast, but over the years its been taking longer and longer to reach orgasm.

My Husband's Missing Sex Drive Is Killing Our Marriage

Thu, 12/29/2011 - 08:46
Submitted by Betty Dodson

My husband's health problems have left us with a nonexistent sex life. Due to diabetes and the meds he takes it's unlikely it will ever get any better. I am 51 and hubby is 55, I feel like I am too young to give up the sexual aspect of a marriage!