Betty Dodson's blog

Almost 50 & Preorgasmic

Wed, 01/18/2017 - 08:02
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I am nearing 50 and unable to fully orgasm, if I am at all. I have been using a hitachi magic wand which I have to cram into my clitoris in order to feel some kind of build up, which then has some kind of end to it. It is nothing like what other people have described to me. I feel nothing when I use my hand. Never have. I am not comfortable with men going down on me because oddly, it feels too sensitive or just uncomfortable. So is it possible that I simply have a clitoris that feels very little? I'm far more excited by penetration and so I wonder if my nerves are concentrated in my vagina more than in my clit.

My Clitoral Hood is Creased

Sun, 01/15/2017 - 07:59
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I have a question about my clitoral hood. Between my clitoral hood and clitoris there's what looks like another fold of skin. I have looked it up online and don't seem to find anything about it. It's almost like the clitoral hood is creased. I have had my labia reduced before because they were so long but they are still pretty long.

Could that have something to do with it?

Dear C,

The fact that you've had labiaplasty indicates you are obsessively concerned about the appearance of your vulva. Yes, "Between my clitoral hood and clitoris there's what looks like another fold of skin" That's most likely what it is. So get over yourself and stop obsessing about how your poor pussy looks.

Maturbating Makes Me Want to Pee

Thu, 01/12/2017 - 09:04
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty and Carlin!

So much love for this website and I love your videos!

So to give you a little background, I am 22 years old and I have been masturbating since I was a child. I always struggled with reaching orgasm because.. it made me want to pee. I've googled this and some say that it might be a "squirting orgasm" and all that jazz but I don't really have orgasms, or rather, they're super small. (I just bought myself a Magic Wand and have been using it everyday since so I doubt that will be a problem any longer! HA HA!!)

Am I a Lesbian or Bisexual?

Sun, 01/08/2017 - 07:54
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I am 17 years old and I'm in a relationship with my girlfriend, although I've always been in romantic relationships with boys, until now. One thing I know for sure is I've always been attracted to women (I've always fantisized about girls bodies) but I don't know if I'm attracted to boys at all: I've never had a sexual experience, encounter or relationship with a man (not because I don't want to, I just haven't had the opportunity) and I think penises are gross and they scare me.

I've read this is normal since I've never had sex with a man and when the time comes I'll get used to it. I'm desperate to know my sexuality because I don't know what to tell people when they ask me and want to label me.

Dear J,

My Views as Life Grows Shorter

Wed, 01/04/2017 - 08:27
Submitted by Betty Dodson
Original Drawing Betty Dodson

I’ve been designing my end game as anyone who has followed my blog knows. You would be surprised how many respond with an image of eternal life and I’m being rather morbid to speak of it ending. Yet it does. As I’ve designed how I have sex how could I not design my death? I consider the true measure of a person’s success is how they end up in old age.

I remember Mother did not want to end up in a nursing home where her oldest sister was. For the last 12 years of Aunt Mae’s life she was in a wheelchair with cancer slowly eating away her upper lip. All she wanted to eat was the desserts they served as she craved sugar to feed her cancer. It was a slow boring death with just my Mother visiting her once a month.

I Feel Pressure But Not Pleasure

Sat, 12/31/2016 - 15:02
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I'm an 18 year old girl who likes girls. I am currently in a long-term relationship but have never orgasmed during intercourse. I feel pressure occasionally but never any pleasure. Touching my clitorus and penetration both just feel like pressure, no sensation at all. I have tried masturbation since I was in middle school or so (maybe a little sooner) with the same results, no sensation.

I Need to Practice Delaying Ejaculation. Should I Cheat or Masturbate?

Thu, 12/29/2016 - 09:03
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

Throughout my 18 year marriage with my wife I've been a premature ejaculator (it's been really hard for both of us). The thing is is that I get turned on so quickly (every time I embrace my wife and give her a kiss there's a stirring in my pants - I never have a cuddle without becoming erect (and it's embarrassing to be honest - perhaps it would be less so if I could avoid cumming after 1 or 2 minutes inside her).

I have found that using a delay cream helps and makes sex last a lot longer and much more enjoyable.

Wife Feels It Takes Me Too Long to Ejaculate

Mon, 12/19/2016 - 08:59
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

Most of your readers complain about them or their men not lasting long enough to enjoy sex. My problem is just the opposite. I enjoy sex and want to enjoy it as long as I can. This means that I can stay erect and have sex for over an hour on average. This has become a problem as my wife feels I take too long.

She says that sex with me is hard work and take a lot of effort. In fact, I am the one doing all the hard work while she enjoys it with her head in the pillows. To please her I try to cum earlier but thats not easy for me and leaves me unsatisfied.

Can You help me figure out how I can finish quickly and enjoy sex at the same time. is there something wrong with me?

Thanks, R

Dear R,

I Feel Pleasure Then Nothing

Thu, 12/15/2016 - 10:20
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hello,

I've run out of things to try to fix my problem. Whenever I feel even a little pleasure in my genital region I have contractions and it's all over. I've been masturbating since I was 11, I'm 23 now. After a few years of masturbating my orgasms became so weak that I basically only had them to fall asleep easier. They haven't improved even with edging or not masturbating for several months.

I'm wondering if I'm even having orgasms. I have the signs of orgasm like contractions in my vagina and feeling relaxed afterwards.

Also I seem to have no erogenous zones, I've touched every part of my body in different ways, even my breasts aren't sensitive. Fingering my vagina doesn't do anything. all I can do is rub or put a vibrator on my clitoris.

Pleasure is Learned

Thu, 12/01/2016 - 14:37
Submitted by Betty Dodson
Original Drawing Betty Dodson

I can’t write a number large enough to cover the amount of emails I get from young, middle-aged, and older woman asking me how to have an orgasm. The constant refrain is that they have tried EVERYTHING and they still can’t come!

Some get a good feeling when they lie on their stomachs and clench their legs together or hump pillows or rolled up blankets until they get some mild feelings but when they roll over and try with their fingers or a vibrator, nothing much happens. Or if it does, those little mild sensations simply could not be an orgasm. Even if she feels her vagina contract or pulsates, she denies anything like an orgasm could have taken place.

New BF Wants Me to Squirt

Mon, 11/28/2016 - 08:51
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty and Carlin,

I'm in my 40's and just getting back out there after my 25 year marriage ended. My sex life with the ex was not too exciting. A new guy I've been seeing for a few months is more adventurous sexually (I took a tip from Betty and went out with a younger guy LOL). Anyhow, this guy seems obsessed with getting me to "squirt" and even makes me feel like there's something wrong with me because I can't pull it off.

I don't know much about it, I pretty much thought it was a "stunt" done in adult movies to make guys think they are "big studs" for making a woman ejaculate. Am I right to be ambivalent about this? Frankly it seems like a big mess more than anything.

Thanks!
R

What is a Good Age to Teach Kids About Sex?

Tue, 11/22/2016 - 08:28
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr. Betty,

I am brand new to this amazing resource and have spent all day combing through posts and podcast videos and I really appreciate what a wonderful set of educational tools you and Carlin have provided here.

I have a 5 year old daughter and I'm wondering how I can incorporate sex education into her development in a healthy way and at what age it's appropriate?

Is My Hooded Clitoris Keeping Me From Pleasure?

Wed, 11/16/2016 - 08:53
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dearest Betty and Carlin, get a drink, this is a long one.

I am a 63yr old lesbian and I have finally started my journey toward sexual healing and liberation. I discovered your wonderful web site while searching for information on hooded clits. Google had listed it’s best results, when I accidentally dropped my mouse on the keyboard, and up popped your clitoral hood chart page. If that’s not the Goddess sending me to you, I don’t know what is.

I started reading. I read for hours. I cried out of pain, I cried out of joy, I cried out of anger, finally I cried out of sadness that it has taken me 63 years to start this healing.