Am I Asexual?

Thu, 03/16/2017 - 08:50
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr. Betty,

I don't know whether I'm asexual or what's up with me. I'm a 24 year old girl. I can watch porn, get turned on and rub my clit until I orgasm, but whenever I've tried sexual things with someone else I just don't get turned on, if anything their bodily fluids (cum, saliva) disgust me and no amount of foreplay can get me wet

I fantasise about doing stuff with guys (and sometimes girls) and find them aesthetically pleasing to look at in images, but the real life thing doesn't do anything for me

What's up with me?

Thank you

J

Dear J,

If you are OK without a sex partner then stay single As long as you are masturbating and enjoying orgasms you are not considered asexual. Instead you are a selfsexual which is a valid lifestyle. Enjoy!

However, I encourage you to create you own fantasies and not to rely only on Internet porn. Fantasy is at the heart of creativity so its very worthwhile to develop. It's also an indicator of what turns you on.

Dr Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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generally

Wed, 03/22/2017 - 07:59
Sybil (not verified)

When anything in life is an absolute requirement for your happiness and self-worth, it is essentially an ‘idol,’ something you are actually worshiping. When such a thing is threatened, your anger is absolute. Your anger is actually the way the idol keeps you in its service, in its
chains. Sex is no different - Hetero, homo, bi, pan - sex is a gift and adds to human flourishing when enjoyed in the way it was designed - within a monogamous relationship between husband and wife. Everything else is counterfeit money.
I'm sure even a monogamous relationship has the quality of an "idol." I'm also sure that sometime, a long time ago, longer than the supposedly 6000 years, two apes had a relationship (whether it was monogamous, we'll never know) on the their way to becoming human beings, and you can think you sweet buns that they did....otherwise you
wouldn't be here.
Besides, a colleague of mine from http://writemyessay.pro/ said this: Humans are born along a linear surface that stretches from horizon to horizon. And on that surface humans born at one end are the ultimate males, while humans born at the other end are the ultimate females. But few humans are born at the extremes of this surface. Most are born closer to the middle of the line and are neither all male nor all female. And some cross the mid-point of this human linear surface and become sexually whatever happens. In fact if humans ever get a reliable
count of how many people are gay or straight, we may discover that being straight is in the minority. And I believe it is quite true and you shouldn't be ashamed of whom you are. That's how you were created.

asexuality

Wed, 04/05/2017 - 23:40
EricaBella (not verified)

Many asexuals I know (myself included) masturbate. The most widley accepted definition of asexual is "does not experience sexual attraction." Plenty of asexuals masturbate. I highly suggest you look up the definition of autochorissexual, which is a type of asexuality. 

codes

Wed, 04/12/2017 - 16:10

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Labels Labels

Sat, 05/06/2017 - 19:47

These days, we are so much more accepting of different lifestyles but they can be constricting sometimes.  AutoSexual, Asexual, masturbatory lifestyle, whatever you want to call it, has become quite common and even popular.  That does not mean you are unable to have fun and share with partners and new experiences can be rewarding and educational.
I suggest hooking up with another masturbator, same or different sex, and masturbate together.  No expectations for anything else.  Mutual masturbation is normal and common and, these days, its so easy to find people on-line and in clubs who are looking for the same.
After a few sessions, than you may be comfortable with each other enough to try other things and it will feel natural. That's actually how my husband and I found each other.  We were both avid masturbators and met at a masturbation party hosted by a girlfriend of mine. 
We still masturbate quite a lot alone and online, over webcam, with our network or online friends.  But we also masturbate together and even enjoy intercourse or oral on occassion.  I think that is life these days.
Martha

Labels Labels

Sat, 05/06/2017 - 19:47

These days, we are so much more accepting of different lifestyles but they can be constricting sometimes.  AutoSexual, Asexual, masturbatory lifestyle, whatever you want to call it, has become quite common and even popular.  That does not mean you are unable to have fun and share with partners and new experiences can be rewarding and educational.
I suggest hooking up with another masturbator, same or different sex, and masturbate together.  No expectations for anything else.  Mutual masturbation is normal and common and, these days, its so easy to find people on-line and in clubs who are looking for the same.
After a few sessions, than you may be comfortable with each other enough to try other things and it will feel natural. That's actually how my husband and I found each other.  We were both avid masturbators and met at a masturbation party hosted by a girlfriend of mine. 
We still masturbate quite a lot alone and online, over webcam, with our network or online friends.  But we also masturbate together and even enjoy intercourse or oral on occassion.  I think that is life these days.
Martha

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