I Feel Pressure But Not Pleasure

Sat, 12/31/2016 - 15:02
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I'm an 18 year old girl who likes girls. I am currently in a long-term relationship but have never orgasmed during intercourse. I feel pressure occasionally but never any pleasure. Touching my clitorus and penetration both just feel like pressure, no sensation at all. I have tried masturbation since I was in middle school or so (maybe a little sooner) with the same results, no sensation.

I have, however, found that the shower head can lead to very brief pleasure but it takes a very long time and only lasts a few seconds before it is gone again. I should also note that while I want to have sex, I'm never sure if I'm even turned on. I've tried many things with no luck. I've read through your articles and tried absolutely everything I could. I simply have no pleasurable sensation.

What can I do??

Dear K, Keep practicing pleasure without any expectations.

Since you had no childhood masturbation, you have never connected the sensations in your genitals to the pleasure center in your brain. This is a slow learning process like what a dancer must do to learn ballet or an artist must do to learn about drawing the nude. It will take a lifetime of practice to slowly begin to feel pleasure.

Meanwhile stop chasing it and simply observe what DOES feel good, like the shower. Little by little you will begin to feel a bit more....

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Elusive questions beget overly general answers

Mon, 01/02/2017 - 11:45
Lizzie Smith

The letter from, K, comes with a very familiar point,
"I've tried many things with no luck..."
General words the writer uses telling of what she has tried, do not give impression of reliable information. Specially young people have very varying perceptions of what for example female masturbation means. 
K, says: "I've read through your articles and tried absolutely everything I could".
This is elusive, too.
The feed-back from the forum could attend to the matter more accurately if the questions were more clear in what the writer means.

Sounds like you need more

NOWHARD's picture
Wed, 01/04/2017 - 04:11

Sounds like you need more lubrication and a vibrator couild be one answer.

Try relaxing more during your masturbation and enjoy your body, dont focus on an orgasm focus on your sexual technique, and are you shaved as this heightens the feelings along with good lubrication.

Last, finger nails trimmed and buffered up, and yes one last thing that may help is a small butt plug well lubricated, could give you that edge. OK