Since Antibiotics My Clit is Sore

Thu, 03/03/2016 - 07:41
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I've been with my partner now for about a year and a half. When we met it was complete passion through and through. But now I don't feel aroused by anything anymore. It takes me a long time to get worked up and I'm always in my head during sex it seems.

I've had about 6-8 UTI's within the last year and have been on antibiotics to treat them all. I became sick on a number of them but have now seemed to clear them all away. Unfortunately ever since all my antibiotics, my clitoris is sore whenever my partner attempts to touch it. This never used to be the case, I used to love when he did so.

Also, I have always been a very sexual person but lately I am not aroused by much. I do not have sexual fantasies anymore and almost never feel an urge to masturbate like I used to daily. I can't tell if this is because of the antibiotics, stress or maybe my birth control?

What is your suggestion? This is weighing heavily on my mind and my relationship and I don't know what to do about it now.

Please help.

Dear T,

STOP taking antibiotics! The next time you get a UTI, use D - Mannose Powder. You can order it from PipingRock.com This is a powder that you take with water that basically flushes out the urinary tract. Google UTI's and get more ideas on how to avoid them. Anal sex is often a problem and be sure to pee after every time you have vaginal sex (urine is an antiseptic). Drink lots of water. You more or less named your problem...{antibiotics, stress or maybe my birth control)? It's a known fact that the Pill lowers our sexual interest. Any woman who really likes sex can learn to use the diaphragm or get the IUD without hormones.

As for your BF doing your clit, you take over and always apply LOTS of organic massage oil before you touch her. Be gentle and she will respond once again.

This is just a temporary set back and desire will return when your health returns and you flush out the ANTI-body meds. Doctors give out antibiotics like they are gumdrops. For me they are only for something VERY serious. Otherwise find a solution in alternative approaches to health and healing for a life time of happy orgasms. Basically the body heals the body given the right nutrition.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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Passion

Thu, 03/03/2016 - 10:08

Dear T,

Every relationship should be complete passion to start with, and all of them lose some of that intensity with time, certainly after a year or two.

How you negotiate the transfer from that full on excitement to a more settled intimacy can be difficult. It seems that this journey has been further complicated by your illnesses. You need to take some time to feel better in yourself, to be kinder to yourself and take the pressure off both you and your partner.

To start with the practical, have you worked out why you were getting so many UTIs? Basic hygiene together with Betty's advice (lots of water, pee after sex) should be enough to prevent most infections, depending on how the two of you have sex. If not, you have to work out exactly what's going on, and change things about to avoid infections going forwards.

Antibiotics are quite restricted over here in the UK, but are useful and necessary medications despite the side effects. They become less useful when used too often. Obviously if the underlying cause of the infection remains, then you'll keep getting infected and antibiotics will not help.

Is your clitoris sore when you touch it or are you still able to happily bring yourself to orgasm? I would go further than Betty and suggest that until you can bring yourself happily and easily to orgasm, then your partner should stay well away.

Mutual masturbation might be a good interim step to consider but above all just cut yourself some slack here. You've been ill. You need time to get better, time to learn to love yourself better and relax back into your stride.

I'm not sure that the two of you will ever recover the full-on intensity and excitement of the first few months but there is a deepness of intimacy in longer term relationships which comes from familiarity, from long-established trust that seems to me to be worthwhile pursuing.
Wishing you well

NLH Passion

Fri, 03/04/2016 - 05:27

As usual, NLH has spoken truly. I just want to add one comment on mutual masturbation. My ex-partner (no, she didn't die, we moved on) who was a very sexual 'high-flyer' developed a rapidly escalating lung disease which dramatically affected her ability to participate in 'normal' sex, so we ended up a lot of the time with entirely satisfactory mutual masturbation. It's not what you do that counts, it's how you think about what you do that matters. So I think MM can be just as intimate as any other kind of sex if that's how you and your partner approach it - it's not second best unless you think it is.

And in the meantime it might be a very useful way to work out just where this infection originates.

David

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