Will the Hitachi Desensitize Me to My Husband's Tongue?

Mon, 10/12/2015 - 09:46
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr Betty,

I know you strongly advocate the Hitachi Magic Wand vibrator. I know you've used it for years. I also know that it packs a good punch (i.e. a very strong vibration). After all these years, do you find that you always need that strong vibration in order to come? In other words, do your fingers still do the trick? How about someone's tongue?

I've been thinking about getting the Hitachi (since I've never owned a vibrator before) but I don't want to become dependent on it. I love my hubby's tongue on my pussy and would hate to become desensitized to it, if you know what I mean ;-).

Can that happen with a vibrator? (especially one as strong as the Hitchai?) In addition to the Hitachi, are there other vibes that your strongly recommend? Thanks so much!


Dear C,

I don't recommend using the Magic Wand since you're currently enjoying oral sex with your husband. Save the Wand for later on in life.

Depending on a persons age, masturbation history and how she experienced her first orgasm will determine the level of stimulation she prefers or needs in order to reach a climax during partner sex. Some women can orgasm from manual or oral sex and still use a vibrator. But if using a vibrator is how a woman has had her first orgasm, chances are good she'll prefer using one with a partner.

I am totally hooked on the Magic Wand vibrator! But then, I'm an octogenarian. Throughout the decade of my seventies, I had a young live-in lover and we had a fabulous time fucking while I used the Wand on my clitoris. My second book Orgasms for Two discusses partner sex for women who need, want or prefer using a vibrator for all of their orgasms.

I didn't discover vibrators until I was 36 when my post marital lover introduced me to one. It most likely saved his life because I wanted sex all the time after being married to a man who ejaculated within a minute after penetration. So partner sex was replaced with masturbation during the day in my art studio while I fantasized hot fucks with handsome strangers. In retrospect, this period of my life prepared me for my next career of teaching masturbation skills to pre-orgasmic women.

By the time I was forty, I used a vibrator for all of my orgasms. Manual or oral sex still felt good but it was never sufficient stimulation for the several orgasms I enjoyed with my vibrator. I'm sure that after being stranded on a deserted Island with no electricity, eventually I'd orgasm with my hand again, but not with oral sex because I'd be too worried about taking so long.

Dr. Betty

PS. A more gentle vibrator is the Eroscillator that is also slim and quiet so it's good for partner sex. I can't come with it but many of my clients enjoy the softer vibes. You can stream some of the images we have posted that show vibrator skills as well as using one with a partner.

Liberating women one orgasm at a time