Penetration is the Bane of My Existence

Tue, 03/24/2015 - 10:47
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I need help, I'm finally with a partner I enjoy, but he's super huge and I'm not so much. I also suffer from vaginsmus, since my first time was very traumatic. He tried to put it in the other day and it was an epic fail, I blame in part the fact that he was on his lunch break, oh well, we tried.

My other partner had no trouble, yet he's more experienced and wasn't expecting to get it in under 30 minutes. Penetration has always been the bane of my existence, any tips on how I can overcome it and not feel like I'm defective. Due to religious upbringing, I also fake it all the time.

Any tips for that would also be helpful.

Dear L,

You need more than "tips"when it comes to enjoying sex with a partner. I'd say closer to a complete overhaul. Things will get better when you start to help yourself. You need to be masturbating regularly with your preference for clitoral stimulation while practicing vaginal penetration. Check out Betty Vaginal Barbell and get in touch with your pelvic floor muscle (PC muscle).

Also STOP faking orgasm which only keeps your BF stupid and dumb about female sexuality. Given your tight pussy with a past problem of trying to accomplish penetration and you tried doing it during your lunch hour? That indicates you're a man pleaser to the detriment of your own orgasm and well being. You also need to use an abundance of some nice organic massage oil and TAKE YOUR TIME while putting yourself first.

There is nothing more exciting to a man than being with an authentically orgasmic woman. Now go practice.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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Betty's last line

Tue, 03/24/2015 - 22:08
Navymale (not verified)

Together with having a partner who has FUN with sex, Betty's last line is totally true. Watching REAL bliss is a HUGE turn on for me, even in my 60s

!Your Enjoyment! No matter the intention or whose orgasm it is!

Mon, 03/30/2015 - 11:31
feminist indignation (not verified)

     L, there is certainly nothing wrong with being a people pleaser when it comes to sex. There is nothing more exciting that enjoying a partner's orgasm; except enjoying your partner and you enjoying your own orgasm; except both of you enjoying your selves and each other's long
and undulating orgasm stimulatingly. And Betty with her vast expense might make
partner plural! Hats off to you for wanting to provide a memorable experience
during your partner's lunch hour, pleasing, indulging, pleasuring with all the
wonder of your feminine body and sexuality. Unfortunately with that noble
intention came some technical sexual problems.

     Betty's advice is spot on and put anther way,
one has to take care of themselves first. Before they can either provide for
themselves or another human being. Sounds selfish? It is only if you do it at
the expense of another's well-being. Making love to someone for their sole
pleasure is perfectly fine if you meet your needs. So it makes no difference
whether one does it professionally (for money) or for the sole and exclusive
pleasure of one's tightly bonded partner or do it with a tightly bonded partner
for your sole pleasure or share in mutual pleasures etc.

      One must understand and take care of their own body first. Understand one's self, make one's self known, truly empathize with a partner. In other words check for understanding with-in one's self, between partners and as community.

     L, everything you wrote suggests you are wanting to do that and Betty as community is providing you with technical sexual information about your arousal and how to be with your self for your enjoyment no matter what the intention or whose orgasm it is.


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