My Masturbation Technique is Killing My Back

Thu, 03/26/2015 - 07:33
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

Can you re-learn masturbation technique? I suffer from PGAD, which I control by masturbating when the symptoms become untolerable, so I absolutely rely on being able to having a masturbation session a couple of times a week. This is hard getting the time for in itself as I am a working married mum.

But also unfortunately my masturbation technique is such that it hurts my back. I am beginning to realise that it must also be rather an unusual technique. Since I was in a high chair as a child I have basically used the same technique, of rubbing back and forth, fully dressed in a seat, now using a cylinder shaped prop held tightly against my vaginal area (outside my clothes) by my thighs. I hold on to the edge of the seat using my hands and I rock vigorously back and forth, folding my feet up under the seat, pressing my legs together. This has always worked fine, but I am now 45 years old, and I know this is hurting my back. I can get quite a sore back after a session.

But I really rely on my regular easing of my PGAD symptoms! Basically I need to learn a new masturbation technique! However, I don't like being touched by hand, and I have tried vibrators, which seem to do nothing to me. My clitoris doesn't like direct touch. I feel like I'm at the end of my tether! Please help!

Dear J,

Yes it's possible to alter your masturbation techniques. But it takes time and consistent practice. Just remember how long you've done this system of yours which is basically pressure only while engaging your leg muscles.

The first step is to do something similar while lying down. Best would be to make friends with you vulva with a free standing mirror and a good light. Just begin by doing a vulva massage without any expectations of arousal. Just pleasant feelings like any body massage. Go onto the website and take advantage of information I have there. Read "First Time Orgasm". Also "Upgrading your masturbation skills." You can't just try something once or twice and expect it to work. You are learning a new dance step and that will take time and practice. At 45, I'd say a quality electric vibrator like the Eroscillator is a must. So reconsider that too.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time