I Want to Experience Orgasm Without Doing All the Work to Get There

Sat, 06/14/2014 - 09:31
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I am 20 years old and I have been doing the whole crossing my legs method of masturbation for a few years now. Like many others I discovered this method completely by accident as a child without even really understanding what I was doing. Climbing the rope in gym or perhaps my history of riding horses made me realize "hey that feels pretty good!"

I have had a few boyfriends and not until this past year have I been able to orgasm any other way besides crossing my legs. Now I can get the same feeling (with A LOT more work) when I am having sex with my boyfriend and on top of him rubbing my clioris against his body very quickly. I've never used any other methods of stimulation such as vibrators, but my boyfriend and I have talked about trying it before.

Sex with him feels really great, but I'm just tired of not being able to orgasm any other way and I think he is too. I want to be able to experience an orgasm that I didn't have to do all of the work for, you know?


Dear A,

Yes, most of us want the "Sleeping Beauty" orgasm where the Prince kisses us and we awakens into full blown orgasmic womanhood. That's our Romantic Sex conditioning thanks to all those fairy tales that Disney resurrected with Dolby sound and Technicolor. (Read The Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm on our website).

After forty some years of teaching girls and women about orgasms, my constant refrain is "Clitoral stimulation during vaginal penetration" At The Same Time! Many of us discover that getting on top and either pressing our clitorises into his body or reaching down and stimulating the clitoris with our fingers gives us divine orgasms. Or if he's trainable, he can do your clitoral stimulation while you focus on enjoying the ride to orgasm.

So stop complaining about having to make an effort to enjoy orgasms with your BF and count your blessings. You can explore vibrators later on in your thirties. For now, you get an A+ in heterosexuality by having orgasms during partner sex. Congratulation!

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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Don't Ruin A Good Thing!

Sun, 06/15/2014 - 09:27

Dear A,

Consider yourself lucky you can orgasm at all during intercourse! I know how difficult it is to even find a guy who isn't trying to to tell us women how we are supposed to orgasm during partner sex. Many women are so repressed, they are still faking and lying through their teeth! So be happy with what you have, try experimenting on new ways to orgasm in intercourse with your current partner, and if you find new ways.....come back here and share with US what you have learned - how about that?

Same with me

Tue, 11/04/2014 - 10:27
Anonymous blob (not verified)

I have the same thing only I am Virgin and very young when I told my parents they said not to be silly and that I am too young for doing things like that I haven't had a boyfriend and when I cross my legs it dosent work any more x Anonymous

I thought i was a weirdo!

Mon, 01/08/2018 - 07:22
DoingThisSince9YrsOld (not verified)

I experienced this orgasm as a child on the monkey bars. A friend said she felt" magnet feeling" when she'd swing on them too and we were in day care. I knew she felt it due to the way she named it. I lay on my bed... Cross my legs, squeeze n lift. I did this many years before losing virginity at 18 lol. Wow ... I'm not alone! I hated explaining my masterbation technique to men, as I thought I sounded crazyy... Be careful...may cause severe headaches afterwards lol.