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Lap Dancing My Way Through College. Tired of Defending My Job

Fri, 01/18/2013 - 10:45
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr. Betty,

First of all let me say I love the website, and will certainly be sharing it with friends!  I am a graduate student in Texas, and for the past 8 months I've been working 2 days a week as an exotic dancer at a very nice club.

The managers are wonderful, I love my job and I can truly say I feel empowered. Not to mention I can pay my own tuition and have lots of time to study. However, lately I've been bombarded with opinions of different people, claiming things like lap dancing is morally wrong because it leads to the objectification of women, or it leads to prostitution, or maybe things like it encourages the 'reckless' sexual pursuits of men. I admit that I have encountered dancers, even in my upscale gentlemen's club, who participate in sexual favors in VIP. I choose to help other law-abiding dancers by dancing clean so as not to encourage this behavior. (Although I don't necessarily believe prostitution is 'bad' in and of itself)

I guess what it really comes down to is that the claims of some of these people have been getting to me, and I don't want to think that I'm hurting anyone by being a dancer. I do love it and wish to continue, but I'd like an experts advice on the pro's and con's of lap dancing. Your time means a lot to me!

Thank you,

E

Dear E,

The fact that you can pay your own tuition and have lots of time to study outweighs all the complaints from these other narrow minded women by far. Some day people might come to understand that lap dancing exploits men, not a women who's doing the dancing on their laps. As a harmless sexual titillation, most of these married men end up going home and masturbating or having sex with their wives.

Several girlfriends of mine (including me) have experienced lap dances and it's quite hot and harmless fun. To my way of thinking, romantic love and marriage are far more dangerous than either lap dancing or prostitution. Like my friend Margo St. James used to say, "Married women sell their bodies permanently while a prostitute only rents hers. I would imagine these dissenting voices just might be a bit jealous. Pay them no mind and continue to enjoy your part time job that sure beats checking out groceries at the local super market.

Dr. Betty

We Suggest: 
Why are Sex Work and Feminism Mutually Exclusive?
Feminism Means Supporting Sex Workers
We Blame Porn Stars, Strippers, Sex Workers, & the Internet Services Like Craigslist for Fueling Peoples Endless Sexual Desires
A Sex Worker & Her Child
Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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You go girl! People need to

Sat, 01/19/2013 - 12:50
Pippa

You go girl! People need to relax and stop getting involved in others' lives. None of their business. You don't even need to justify or defend you job, it's what you do, you do it because you like it, full stop. I'm a grad student too and paid for my undergard degree waiting on tables. I didn't mind it too much but wish I had had the awareness, opportunity, courage, whatever - the combination of things you've got! Good luck xxx   

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