Cleaning Up the Confusion Over Female Orgasm

Tue, 10/02/2012 - 13:28
Submitted by Betty Dodson

After viewing our latest youtube clip about female ejaculate, my Biologist friend Alberto Rubio Casillas stated the following:

"In the squirting samples I have analyzed the fluid was colorless, odorless, and with very low density. In the squirting samples analyzed by Dr. Emmanuele Jannini and I, we detected the presence of PSA in low concentrations, showing that both fluids mixed during the urethral expulsion. So, in my opinion, to assert that squirting is equal to the expulsion of diluted urine is an oversimplification of a very complex phenomena.

Female ejaculation and squirting/gushing are two different phenomena. The organs and the mechanisms that produce them are different. The real female ejaculation is the release of a very scanty, thick, and whitish fluid from the female prostate, while the squirting is the expulsion of a diluted fluid from the urinary bladder. It could be hypothesized, from our data, that during the sexual stimulation of CUV (Clitoro-Urethro-Vaginal) Complex or orgasm, the female prostate sometimes pours its secretions and they mix with diluted fluid coming from the urinary bladder.

Due to this complex interaction between the female prostate and the bladder, It would be very risky to affirm that women who squirt are 'simply urinating.' However, this interaction does not always occur and orgasm is not always associated with female ejaculation or with squirting. From the physiological standpoint, it would be interesting to investigate how the kidneys increase their GFR ( Glomerular Filtration Rate ) to produce this over diluted urine during sexual arousal. We do not know what factors are involved, maybe sexual hormones, or the ADH, Oxytocin, Nitric Oxide ,etc. For example, very recently it was reported that nitric oxide is able to inhibit the anti diuretic hormone (ADH), and to promote diuresis. You know that nitric oxide is very important for male and female genital responses.

Our data supports what Dr. Beverly and co-workers found in 1981, that is, that female ejaculation is different from urine. They reported female ejaculate is no more than a teaspoon and based on anatomical and physiological data, I state that the female prostate can not produce great amounts of fluid. I totally agree with your position regarding the statements some women make about orgasm/squirting: "But it could not be an orgasm, because I did not ejaculate." A woman can have an orgasm without ejaculating or squirting. They are not a sine qua non condition for orgasm.

This misinformation is very widespread due mainly to the porn industry, I have seen many of those videos with women squirting and faking orgasms. Women have to know that neither squirting nor female ejaculation are the key to a better orgasm. Unfortunately some people are selling this idea because of their monetary interests. It is incorrect to affirm that a specific type of sexual stimulation is superior to another, i.e, clitoral orgasm, vaginal orgasm, female ejaculation or squirting. What is best for one is not true for others. So we must be open to accept women's varied sexual preferences and not to label them as better or worse or less pleasurable. Women need to explore their vast sensual and sexual potential, but not to be obsessed in finding the G spot, the A Spot, female ejaculation, and lately squirting.

Finally I will quote exactly the words of my colleague and friend Dr. Beverly Whipple: "It is also important not to put women into a model of only one or two ways to experience sensual and sexual pleasure, satisfaction, and orgasm. Women need to be encouraged to feel good about the variety of ways they experience sexual pleasure, without setting up specific goals (such as finding the G-spot, experiencing female ejaculation, or experiencing a VAO (vaginally activated orgasm). Healthy sexuality begins with acceptance of the self, in addition to an emphasis of the process, rather than the goals, of sexual interactions."

I get the last word because it's my website: So I stand corrected in saying that squirting is simply peeing. That's an over simplification. However, most of the liquid is coming from the bladder! Also squirting and female ejaculation are two different mechanisms and neither one has anything to do with having an orgasm. My friend Alberto is a biologist working in a research laboratory. I'm not a scientist in any traditional sense. My information about female sexuality comes from personal experience and first hand observation. Sure I've read lots of sex books. Many have been informative and some I've disagreed with their conclusions.

For instance, M & J stated the clitoris is a woman's primary trigger for orgasm but then they have her coming from his penis after she's been sufficiently aroused via her clitoris. The New Sex Therapy by Helen Kaplan, (the Bible for many sex therapists) follows that same pattern. Her clitoris is stimulated until she is right in front of a climax and then he switches over to "thrusting vigorously" inside her vagina. Voila! The penis is still King of a woman's orgasm! To my way of thinking, this is the male model of sexual response as applied to women.

Once again, it's been my experience (backed by numerous women in agreement) that once we are really close to orgasm from clitoral stimulation and our partner switches over to vaginal penetration, we drop back to some degree. That means we must build up more arousal in order to have an orgasm, but alas, Romeo has ejaculated. End of sex! Unless he is a considerate lover who does manual, oral or hands her a vibrator before he gets up and heads for the frig to get a beer and make a sandwich.

My biggest complaint! We now have boys, girls and many adults equating "squirting" with female orgasm. The bigger the wet spot, the bigger the cum! So we are back inside vaginas stimulating some "spot" which technically is very indirect clitoral stimulation of the engorged urethral sponge that is part of the internal clitoral system.

Instead of sustaining the age old conflict of clitoral vs vaginal orgasm, I prefer the combination orgasm: Vaginal penetration with clitoral stimulation at the same time. I also suggest each woman be in charge of her clitoris just as each man is in charge of his penis during intercourse. If we see partner sex like dancing, the freedom of the 70's with rock n roll music allowed couples to dance together but apart. Women could make their own moves instead of following the lead of her partner. That did not eliminate other forms of dancing with a partner. We can still enjoy slow dancing, the Rumba, a formal waltz or Salsa, etc.

Clearing up the confusion over female orgasm to be continued.

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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Dr Betty, I don't understand . . .

Tue, 10/02/2012 - 18:20

I don't understand the current emphasis on 'female ejaculation'. Somebody apparently decided, by an invalid analogy to male sexual response, that it was desirable for women to 'ejaculate' too (hence the confused association between squirting and female orgasm). This seems so completely off base that I don't understand why anyone believes it. (Now we have porn stars 'ejaculating' on demand by faking orgasm and ejecting fluid they stored internally prior to filming.) Maybe it has something to do with selling those 'how to female-ejaculate' instructional videos. For those women who naturally do squirt, it's of course fine, but the majority of women do not squirt and manage to have very satisfying orgasms anyway. I've wondered what causes the phenomenon of female squirting and what the fluid is composed of, so it's very interesting to have a scientifc answer. However, I think that 'female ejaculation' has become a fad that has seized on a relatively unusual characteristic of some women's sexuality and tried to claim that it's something most women should strive for.

On another note, women and men shouldn't blame each other because their arousal patterns are different. That isn't anyone's fault. We should just be aware of what those patterns are. And both partners need to be considerate and unselfish in accomodating one another's differences and needs. Historically there has certainly been an overemphasis on intercourse. Some women do come reliably from penetrative sex (about twenty-five percent according to many experts), and about as many orgasm occasionally that way. Others---about half---don't orgasm at all from penetration alone. So while millions of women do have orgasms from intercourse, even more do not---a fact that both genders need to understand. I suspect that the way intercourse is emphasized in many sex manuals is intended to bond hetero couples more closely together. While bonding is very beneficial for committed couples, there apparently needs to be much more information in these texts about varieties of enjoyable stimulation for both sexes. Isn't Helen Kaplan's book out of date by now, for example? I would find it hard to believe that a modern sex therapist would teach that standard foreplay followed by intercourse is all a couple should want or need.

Oh my stars! so much angst over sex

Tue, 10/02/2012 - 19:44
Jake E

Sex is an art and humanity and without negative judgement the different ways to orgasm or find pleasure are there to enjoy and try if we want to. 

My wife ejaculated/squirted

Wed, 10/03/2012 - 00:32

My wife ejaculated/squirted the first time we had sex and it was wonderful for both of us. That was 22 years ago and I will testify after cleaning up and investigating first had that the fluid when dried had a milky white color,a buttery taste,and a slight urine smell but sweeter. I have also had her urinate on me to try and figure out the difference and it is a difference.
The biggest problem to women who do not experence this is trying to do this and not focusing on her own pleasure/orgasm. Each woman is different just as each man is different. Kids really need to know this and the porn industry is trying to make a buck on the latest "fad" and not concerned about accurate sexual images.