Why Does It Feel Better When Someone Else Stimulates Your Clitoris?

Sat, 09/15/2012 - 19:55
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr.Betty,

My boyfriend was wondering if there was a quick way to get me to orgasm and I told him that doggystyle with him touching more clitoris would do amazing things and that I've also fantasied about it. I've never seen a guy who does not enjoy doggystyle but it hurts his knees and he's uncomfortable.

The only thing I've noticed is his positioning is wide apart along with my legs but he doesnt understand what I mean when I say it might be better for him if his legs were closer together. What can I do to help? ... Also why does it feel more amazing when a guy touches your clitoris then yourself? (I always feel like their finger is warmer and more pleasurable and mine are cool and boney I can get myself off but a guys just feels 10X better) My boyfriend and I have been dating 2 years so I know there's much to learn I just want to make things better.


Dear C,

The first glaring problem is that you and your BF want to know how to get you to come more quickly. Women need far more time to warm up beyond a little kissing and breast fondling. I'm always recommending couples slow down when it comes to sex and orgasms.

As for the best position for Doggie it varies according to body types. It sounds like he's climbing up too high on you. Demonstrate by getting behind him to show exactly what you mean. The idea that you want him to stimulate your breasts or clitoris doesn't make sense in this position. You stimulate your own clitoris while he focuses on thrusting rhythmically with his penis. Put some padding down for his knees or get on top of your bed.

You could benefit from reading my e-book "Orgasms for Two". I have drawings of different positions that work well especially for women who use vibrators or want some kind of clitoral stimulation during intercourse. The fact that you feel a guys touch is better than yours is a personal thing. I find that no one knows my clitoris as well as I do. Therefor I prefer my own touch. Enjoy!

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time