Mother/Daughter Advice on First Time Tampon Use

Wed, 12/21/2011 - 07:54
Submitted by Betty Dodson

hey Betty,

I hope this finds you well and all set for Kissmass. I need to pick your brains on something. My daughter has decided she wants to try tampons instead of pads. So we sat down on the weekend and I did the period related "show and tell" with her first with a mirror in the bathroom. So she had a good idea of her bits and what a vagina is and where a tampon goes and why it is important to relax.

She said it was hurting so we stopped. I think she probably was too tense but could it be the hymen that is hurting? Could she have one covering her vaginal opening? I got her to try with her fingers before the tampon and to feel around inside to feel which direction her vaginal passage went so she would know which direction to push the tampon. She seemed to come up against something she described as "soft but blocking her way". Could this be her hymen? Should I encourage her to push through it to get the tampon in?


Dear L,

Instead of thinking it might be her hymen, (its existence has been debated) I would suspect it's simply muscular from a tight little vagina that has never been penetrated. I too remember it hurt when I first tried a tampon. Over time, using my finger to penetrate my vagina when I masturbated helped a lot. She just needs to continue to experiment on her own. Getting the right angle was also confusing, but again, practice will help. My second big hurdle was not getting it all the way inside which was very uncomfortable. Be sure she uses saliva or some kind of lube.

First time vaginal penetration takes time and practice like anything else. My girlfriend and I worked on tampon insertion one whole weekend but it took me longer to get used to it. She learned more quickly.

Check out what this Darling German doctor claims. He's got one of the best explanations yet.

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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It might also help to put a

Wed, 12/21/2011 - 18:28
Elin A (not verified)

It might also help to put a glob of vaseline just on the tip of the tampon. As well as this, buy tampons with a smooth, rounded or peaked surface that doesn't "lint". Also, if her flow isn't very heavy, to start with perhaps the smallest tampon size and just change it more often. It will be easier to insert, and more frequent insertions might help her get used to the whole deal faster. If it is the hymen, that too might naturally stretch due to the new "invadors". The thing "soft but blocking her way" could simply be the cervix, in which case the tampon doesn't have to go further in. Nowadays I use menstrual cups, which in my opinion is more convenient. But I remember never inserting the tampon further up than the length of a finger, it should only be so far up that you can't feel it (although she might in the beginning anyway).

so what if a male doctor

Wed, 12/21/2011 - 20:43
lsjb (not verified)

so what if a male doctor called betty a "darling" doctor. would that have been received in such an accepting way;. oh man, i think not.

L, my daughter has a similar experience

Wed, 12/21/2011 - 21:20

She prefers pads but has tried tampons once or twice in order to be able to go swimming while on her period. There are some teen ones that while she was able to use, she found uncomfortable. Ones made for adults, even if they are for light flow, simply do not work for her as they are too painful to insert. It's led to good conversations about being female and doing things that are comfortable and best for her. Maybe trying different positions for insertion either tilting the pelvis one way or the other. For me, a forward tilt works best and if I'm in a rush and my pelvis is tilting backwards, it's slightly uncomfortable.

Did she try standing up with

Fri, 12/23/2011 - 20:35
Elin A (not verified)

Did she try standing up with one leg on the toilet? That opens one up. A forward tilt works well, since the vagina tilts backwards. But you didn't say how old she is, that could also be a factor. I've heard that the hymen naturally retracts in puberty, but I can't verify this information. But if it's true, if she's quite young it might not have retracted. Of course this is all speculation on my part.
And perhaps masturbation is a factor, too? If one doesn't masturbate, perhaps this affects one's flexibility? Again, speculation. I wish I could go to school and learn this stuff.
Ps! Does she say where it hurts? Is it a bit up or at the entrance of the vagina?

Great post

Thu, 01/26/2012 - 10:13
Consultoria RH (not verified)

Este blog é uma representação exata de competências. Eu

gosto da sua recomendação. Um grande conceito que reflete os pensamentos do

escritor. Consultoria RH