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How Can I Make Girl on Top Positions More Comfortable?

Wed, 07/06/2011 - 12:18
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

You wonderful woman you, the knowledge and acceptance you share on your website has already helped my sex life and body image in more ways than I can count and now I have a question for you.

How can I make girl on top positions more comfortable? I'm more than aware of its popularity with men and women and I as a seemingly decently fit woman am terrible at it. I do tons of yoga and yet my hips just don't seem to want to make it work and when I move to something more akin to squatting I'm then dealing with lots of pain in my quadriceps. This leads to me putting my hands above his shoulders and leaning forward, the most comfortable position for me but then we risk him slipping out or worse, the miss thrust.

Ultimately, this leads to a reasonable amount of anxiety over a position that seems to be everyone's favorite, except me. Any advice?

Thank you.

Dear T,

Cowgirl (woman on top) was always one of my favorites. It's when I could "Run the fuck" which most of my boyfriends appreciated. When you feel the need to lean forward, place your hands on his chest. That way you don't get such an extreme angle. I also used to brace myself by putting my hands on my thighs for easy thrusting. Instead of pulling all the way out by going up and down, consider smaller movement more like grinding down on him and making small circles. Also you can try reverse Cow Girl by facing the other direction.

As for the squatting, forget it. Most of us can't handle that position long enough to enjoy it unless you're some kind of athlete. At times you can actually lay down on top of him and rest your upper body on your elbows. Thanks for asking and for taking advantage of my information.

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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up and down vs forward and backward

Thu, 07/07/2011 - 16:18
Dane (not verified)

Instead of going up and down when you are leaning forward, go "forward and backward".
In this way you can put your weight and balance in your knees, instead of only your arms and feet.
Make the rhythm so that there is more "power" down/backward than up/forward.
Make him "control" the rhythm gently with his hands on your hips, it can be more easy that way. 
Exercise makes perfect, is my experience ;)
I've had the same problems myself, but my current boyfriend was very patient. I think it was a good investment for him to let me practice - now its his favorite ;)
(Excuse my bad English :) I'm from Scandinavia)

@ T

Thu, 07/07/2011 - 20:30
Heylin

I like Dane's recommendations. Another one I used when I did yoga more frequently was to do the cowgirl position on my knees and lean back with my hands on my heels. Then I would rock my hips backwards and forwards (and a little side to side). I also do a little belly dancing and find that it really helps me move my hips. However, one thing I try to keep in mind while fucking is that if a position isn't working, it's easy to change. The best sex for me involves at least 3 positions for intercourse, it helps prevent him from coming too soon, it helps prevent fatigue, and it helps provide for different sensations. And on some days, certain positions just don't work for me and other times certain positions are uncomfortable or painful for one or both of us. Practice makes perfect, so have fun and experiment!

grinding....

Fri, 07/08/2011 - 14:15
IHeldYouCloser (not verified)

I find that the best way for me to have an orgasm on top is to have him grab my hips and forcefully grind me back and forth over his pelvic bone.  He gets his friction, I get my clitoral stimulation.  It's SO GOOD! and it keeps me from getting to tired to maintain the rhythm.  Between his arms and your legs, you can keep going forever...and coming forever :)

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