Home » Blogs » Betty Dodson's blog

Was It an Orgasm?

Thu, 06/23/2011 - 10:22
Submitted by Betty Dodson

i am 25. for years i've said: i can't orgasm. i've read your books, other books, watched feminist porn, read susie bright, watched non-feminist porn, had all kinds of sex, used vibrators, even the magic wand. today i was with a straight female friend and she decided to help me get off using my magic wand and an attachment. it was great, intense, my legs shook. she said it was an orgasm. i've done this before and never called it that.

it seems like climbing a hill and stopping--i never felt an release, any minor explosion. yet, my friend believes physiologically (& perhaps mentally) it was an orgasm. discharge came out, my vagina looked like an orgasm. so have i been expecting too much all of these years? can it just be a little leg shaking and moaning?

thanks so much. your work is really inspiring.

Dear K,

Yes, an orgasm can be just a little leg shaking and moaning. Many women hold such idealized images of what an orgasm is that they do not recognize what's happening to their own bodies. So how about forgetting all those exaggerated ideas of orgasm and simply enjoy what's happening at the moment.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

anti conception

Sun, 06/26/2011 - 15:46
luiza (not verified)

dear betty,
what are your thoughts on the "spiral" or"the coil" as an anti conception ?
the pill always frightened me. My mother used to say that "intuitively there had to be something wrong" with a medication that interfered so profoundly at a hormnal level with THE most important ability of a woman. Namely procreation.
Hence I have never taken the pill but used "the coil" or "spiral" since i was 18. My sisters were unable to use it, but I never had a probem.
I later had three beautiful children and still use "the coil".
I have never had reason to think it interferred with my hormonal equilibrium or sex drive.
I'm curious to have your comments.
thank you
L

Orgasm or health problem?

Wed, 07/13/2011 - 12:24
Julie1111 (not verified)

Dear Betty,
I've been wanting to find out if clitoral and vaginal orgasms feel different? I know I've had orgasms during masturbation and oral sex but never the same kind of release during vaginal sex. When having sex I sometimes (not all the time) feel my hands and face get tingely or go numb and my fingers will curl and stiffen up.  These sensations last for about 15 minutes or more after sex. I notice when this happens, I'm usually breathing very heavily. Does this sound like a vaginal orgasm or a possible health issue?
Thank you so much
J

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.