i am 25. for years i've said: i can't orgasm. i've read your books, other books, watched feminist porn, read susie bright, watched non-feminist porn, had all kinds of sex, used vibrators, even the magic wand. today i was with a straight female friend and she decided to help me get off using my magic wand and an attachment. it was great, intense, my legs shook. she said it was an orgasm. i've done this before and never called it that.
it seems like climbing a hill and stopping--i never felt an release, any minor explosion. yet, my friend believes physiologically (& perhaps mentally) it was an orgasm. discharge came out, my vagina looked like an orgasm. so have i been expecting too much all of these years? can it just be a little leg shaking and moaning?
thanks so much. your work is really inspiring.
Yes, an orgasm can be just a little leg shaking and moaning. Many women hold such idealized images of what an orgasm is that they do not recognize what's happening to their own bodies. So how about forgetting all those exaggerated ideas of orgasm and simply enjoy what's happening at the moment.