Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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I found your videos on YouTube as vidakitty2000 and was directed here to have a question answered. I am 21 years of age, a commissioned artist, and a semi-active individual (I swim about twice a week, and walk a lot. Eat very well.)

I'm concerned about myself.

For years now, I've had problems with orgasms. Let me explain.

When I was 7 years old, a teenaged cousin sexually abused me. Since, I've had a fear of me. I cannot use dildos, I can't even insert my fingers. It causes me both physical pain and mental stress. My OBGYN just tells me that it's psychological, and that I will get over it in time. Well, it's been a long time since he's told me that, and I still have issues.

The other problem is this:

A year ago, I had a burst ovarian cyst on the left ovary. Since this has occurred, whenever I orgasm, I experience cramping, lower intestinal problems, pelvic pain, and bloating. I've noticed it gets better around my period, and worsens shortly before or after I have finished. I watched some videos and read some things over breathing properly during orgasm/stimulation, and it helped somewhat. The only things that seem to honestly help are increasing fiber, heating pads, hot baths, and belly massages (particularly around the pelvic region).

Please, have you ever heard of anything like this? I'm going to see a doctor, but, I want to know if there's anything I should tell him, or any advice you could give me? This is horribly stressful and really cuts into my personal life. My girlfriend worries about me (if you are wondering, I am bisexual and in a female relationship). This problem often ruins dates with potential boy friends or male partners.

I hope you can give me some advice.

Thank you, so much, for even listening,

JS

Dear JS,

Since I'm a sexologist and not an MD, I don't feel qualified to answer your question. However I just Googled "Burst Ovarian Cyst" and there are conversations listed from women who have suffered the same thing. I value personal experiences along with professional advice. Check it out. Gather as much info as you can an ask questions until you are blue in the face.

As for you earlier unwanted sexual experience from a horny cousin, drop the abuse image. Reclaim your sexuality through sex with yourself. When you clear up the ovary issue, you can focus on working your pelvic floor muscle by following my instructions under Betty's Vagina Barbell. Every orgasm you have is part of your sexual healing. Let me know what you find out and how you solved your problem.

Dr. Betty