Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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I remember when Wade Boggs used the "sex addict" plea way back in 1989. Boggs also asserted once that he "willed himself invisible". I always felt both claims were equally believable. :-)

this is an ongoing sometimes overheated debate among the docs who define diagnoses -- compulsion or addiction. of course there is the 'man team" that thinks the only thing better than sex is more sex.

the important distinction here is that folks who are compulsive are not happy about it. Their emotions are "chafed" not their genitals. they are in psychological pain, by their own admission. the rush from sex is brief , followed by shame, followed by anxiety, followed by further "acting out." The behaviors are not about pleasure but an uncontrolled search for self fulfillment and inability to sustain an intimate relationship.

I agree that "addiction" is an incorrect concept for these kinds of problems. There is no substance. However the pattern that is followed is very similar. There is no "de-tox" although there are drugs that destroy libido.
The consequences of sexual compulsivity is often loss of self, loss of relationship. career, criminal charges, etc.

Make no mistake, someone who is sexually compulsive is not filled with pleasure; they are driven, gravely unhappy and out of control. that is not a moral judgement on my part. it is what i hear in my office every day.

as far as tiger is concerned, we do not know what's up with him. he may just be over-important and self absorbed, not to mention overly connected. no one knows and more importantly who cares.

those who suffer with sexual compulsivity need help and compassion, not jokes and unjustified admiration.

The American Psychological Association doesn't recognize sex addiction as real.  Sex addiction isn't included in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual
of Mental Disorders, the standard for mental health workers.

"I see my body as an instrument, rather than an ornament." - Alanis Morissette

the new proposed DSM does not consider sexual "addiction" but rather a new designation called "hypersexual disorder." This embraces the compulsivity and out of control aspect and is accepted by the mental health community.

that's what we agree on. It's compulsive behavior NOT an addiction. Addiction connotes a certain lack of responsibility and that one can become "addicted" to sex. That's scary territory and I think young people have enough to worry about without thinking they could become sex addicts. 

"I see my body as an instrument, rather than an ornament." - Alanis Morissette

I'm with Carlin and Betty on this one. Sex addiction is a myth, but compulsive, self destructive sexual behavior can be a problem. I think it's usually symptomatic of other problems in the person's life and psyche that need to be addressed.

When all is said and done i think "a rose by any other name is still a rose." what's important isn't the infighting about words but finding help and allowing the problem to be called out. the battle over terms sounds more like "me thinks thou dost protest too much." Let's get on with it and deal. of course it's not an addiction by precise meaning but the general public doesn't understand "compulsivity" when it relates to sex and surely most men don't. They think it means "virile."

lsjb

Saw/heard two things this morning on the topic on NPR and alternet. Not sure why the NPR link is not going hyper, but c'est la vie:

http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2010/03/sex_addiction_a_disease_or_an.html

http://www.alternet.org/story/145240/sex_addiction%3A_a_b.s._excuse_for_...