Ask Doctor Betty

I have a problem with my son who is 16. Recently he has taken a liking to wearing my panties. He thinks that I don't know about his fetish because he replaces my panties carefully, but I know. Last week I discovered that two or three of my sanitary pads were missing, and yesterday I found one pad in a basement wastebasket. Obviously Bob had masturbated on the pad. I can't help thinking he wanted me to find the ejaculation.

Hello, I have just left a five+ year relationship with a man who never got me off. I must say I feel partially responsible for this, as I've never been a masturbator, and know very little about my vulva. I watched one of your videos and am now determined to orgasm, but I feel like my genitals have lost sensitivity. Is it possible to kill your clit by ignoring it, and can it come back to life with practice?

Hey betty,

I've been wondering this question for a long time. I have been with my bf for 2 years and he's been wanting to give me oral but im scared for many reasons. he keeps telling me that its not a big deal but I want to get over my fears and make him happy so please help me. btw your my hero and amazing.

I am hetero woman in my 60's and have lost most of my pubic hair. It looks so ugly, I feel so repelled, I can't look at myself or touch myself. How does one "groom" oneself with so little hair left?

Also, have been celibate a long time now. Used to masturbate a great deal during periods of celibacy, but have no sexual libido now. How to get it back? I hate feeling sexually dead.

I came across an article in the New Scientist showing how ejaculation relieves hay fever and allergies. I have a son who just turned 14 and has always had severe allergies but all those medications never helped much. Also, decongestants have side effects and cause other problems when you use them heavily over long stretches. I know my son had begun masturbating since our talk last year on the birds and the bees so it was time anyway to have another talk. I decided to roll this in and suggest he experiment.

I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now. I can always bring myself to orgasm alone within minutes, but have never had an orgasm with him. He doesn't want to use my vibrator while we are together, even though I only want it for clitoral stimulation. I am the only woman he has had sex with, and I have never orgasmed with another boyfriend, so we don't really know what to do.

I'm nineteen and after a while into masturbating (unfortunately it occasionally takes me a bit, but I'm guessing that's from being pretty much new to it?) I'll feel like I'm right on the edge to an orgasm- but then it feels like I get way too sensitive to keep going since it gets painful. I really enjoy the build up, but then it gets to that point that I honestly can't stand it.

You never mention much about foreplay. I have found that having my breasts fondled and the nipples sucked sends me into a divine orbit ready for anything he can provide. What about this important prelude to orgasm?

Is it normal for my labia to be bumpy? I have had numerous exams and I had a std test last year and have only had sex with one person since. It came back with nothing. Should I be concerned? it has been bumpy ever since I can remember.

Dear Betty,
(you're my hero, by the way!)

When I'm aroused, I feel the arousal in my mind and in my mouth. I start fantasizing about oral activities... kissing and licking my way down their body, sucking their toes, going up to lick and suck on their clit or cock. The same was true when I was stripping... when I was aroused, I didn't feel aroused in my genitals, I felt it in my mouth. This is all well and fine, but I'd like to feel arousal in my vulva! What are your thoughts?